Episode 358 – Don’t Forget to Sing Your Song
Today we have Randy. He is 43, from Indianapolis, and took his last drink on December 30, 2016.
Registration is now open for Restore which begins January 1,2022. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/restore/
Highlights from Paul
This week’s tips from Paul include: 1) not everyone drinks, 2) sing, 3) give yourself a hug and say I love you.
There is a lot of uncertainty in the world and change is hard. Find your song, that melody in your soul that is uniquely you that you sing over and over. You are the master creator of your life. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/
Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
[9:27] Randy has been sober for nearly 5 years. He is married with 4 kids and loves animals and running.
Randy was on episode 129. Randy was in the restaurant business, and he was always surrounded by people who drank. Toward the end, the hangovers and anxiety began to take a toll on him.
Drinking was a reward for Randy. Today, Randy doesn’t have to think about drinking. He isn’t spending money on alcohol. Now he can afford season tickets to the Colt’s game. He doesn’t have to think about getting there or getting back, because he is sober.
Randy is now methodical vs living on instant gratification. He is more approachable and he loves giving service to others.
Initially watching football was really hard for Randy, because the sport was so engrained with alcohol. Now he enjoys games more than ever.
Kris’s Summary
Kris speaks to the term chosen family. Kris’ recovery family wants him to be successful and free. They take him at his best and his worst. They laugh together, cry together, dance and walk the path together. We need to open up, be vulnerable and let others love us until we learn to love ourselves. You can do this.
Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
Holiday 2021 AF Survival Guide
Upcoming events, retreats, and courses:
Resources
Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee.
Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here!
Episode 357 – Practice Saying No
Today we have Jenn. She is 34, from Michigan, and took her last drink on April 10, 2020.
Registration is now open for Restore which begins January 1,2022. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/restore/. AF Ukulele course starts 2/5/22 at 3 PM EST. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/ukulele/
Highlights from Paul
Paul talks about the parameters for success. There’s an unhealthy paradigm in the sobriety world that it’s all a bust if we drink once. While continuous sobriety is the ultimate goal, getting there is never pretty, and most likely is launched off a series of relapses or field research. If you are drinking less than you did last holiday season, that’s a huge improvement.
This week’s tips from Paul include: 1) say no, 2) practice saying no, 3) create your own pep talk.
Sometimes the desire to stop drinking only swirls in our thoughts. Don’t underestimate the power of thought. Our thoughts are powerful. They create our world. Immediately discard the thoughts that don’t align with your goals. Deconstruct them and become aware of thoughts that are not congruent with what you want and need in life. Use the thinking mind for creation and visualization. Visualize that you no longer drink. Repeat it, say it out loud and repeat it again. What you put in is what you get back. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/
Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
[12;43] Jenn took her last drink April 10, 2020. She has a husband, two children and loves hiking, being in nature and spending time with her family.
Jenn said from her first sip of alcohol she felt some inner peace. Her first black out was at age 14. She started off with a bang and got in plenty of trouble. She experienced some trauma and started to use alcohol as her coping mechanism. She had suicidal ideations and started cutting. She drank a 5th a night. Before she turned 21, she added cocaine.
She was a functioning alcoholic through her twenties and early thirties. In her thirties, her drinking took on a dark shift. She was suicidal and she knew that she had to save herself and get some help. Jenn had to be brutally honest with herself. She was asking the wrong people for help. Her internal and external worlds were completely opposed.
Jenn had multiple attempts at sobriety. She worked with a therapist for two years and real change began. The accountability of Café RE reinforced her commitment to sobriety. She is now a recovery coach.
Odette’s Summary
Odette reminds us that change starts with us. If you are waiting for things to change, for people to change, for life to change, you may be waiting for a long time. Recovery is our responsibility. Everything that we wish to see in others needs to start with us. Be the person you wish everyone around you was and see how life can change.
“I really think the secret to being loved is to love. And the secret to being interesting is being interested. And the secret to having a friend is being a friend.”
Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
Holiday 2021 AF Survival Guide
Upcoming events, retreats, and courses:
Resources
Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee.
Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here!
Episode 356 – Play the Tape Forward
Today we have Ashley. She is 35 from Orange County, CA, and took her last drink on January 7, 2006.
Registration is now open for Restore, which begins January 1, 2022. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/restore/
Café RE: https://www.recoveryelevator.com/cafere/
Highlights from Paul
Paul encourages you to check in with yourself about your feelings about your AF journey. There are more recovery modalities than ever. Keep searching for the one that works for you. This week’s tips are: Play the tape forward. Treat yourself to a gift. Take three deep breaths into the lower lobes of the lung.
Drinking served a purpose for you initially. Alcohol suppresses your inner turmoil: It gives you a sense of calm. As you continue to suppress those voices, they grow louder, and you must drink more to make those feelings go away. If you continue to override your internal guidance system, you live life truly blind, and nothing of significance takes place. When do the miracles of sobriety occur? Day 1, day 500? It’s up to you to find out. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/
Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
[12:45] Ashley took her last drink on January 7, 2006. She is married, has twin boys, and in 2010 co-founded an SV start-up that offers online outpatient addiction treatment. She has a podcast called the courage to change. https://www.lionrock.life/couragetochangepodcast She is finishing her MBA, loves yoga, the outdoors, reading and comedy. Since she got sober at 19, she has been revisiting fun at her current stage of life.
Ashley’s first drink was a beer she stole from her parents’ fridge, and it took her a week to finish it. She felt like she was born with her skin too tight and always believed she was too much. She tried to make herself into what others wanted her to be.
Ashley hired alcohol and drugs to do a job for her to make her feel okay and want to be on the planet. By age 14, she was addicted to cocaine. Through a boyfriend, she got addicted to heroin. She was sent to several lockdown programs that were popular in early 2000. She couldn’t stay sober in treatment. She would create disasters, leave, and change treatment centers. She eventually left treatment and decided to drink instead of doing drugs.
In 2006 she started going to AA meetings, listening, and letting go of her old ideas, which was hard to do. Her life became different when she let others help her and did what they said. She went to college, had relationships, and started a company.
Instagram: @sobermomsquad ; https://www.lionrockrecovery.com/
Ashley went to meetings four days a week in early sobriety and participated in the fellowship. Ashley did not heal her trauma in 12-step; therapy was essential for Ashley to do the work. A young people’s AA group in So CA allowed her to meet some great young people, and they partied without the alcohol. She has been reinventing her recovery since having children.
Odette’s Summary
Where do I feel safe enough to be my best calm self?
Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
Holiday 2021 AF Survival Guide
Upcoming events, retreats, and courses:
Resources
Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee.
Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here!
Episode 355 – the Uno reverse card.
Today we have Rocio. She is 42, from Washington state, and took her last drink on August 31, 2020.
Registration is now open for Restore which begins January 1,2022. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/restore/
Highlights from Paul
Paul reminds you if you drank over Thanksgiving or your sobriety plans aren’t going so hot, don’t kick the bucket to January or to the next holiday season.
This week’s tips from Paul include: 1) rest, 2) Uno reverse card – remember that most criticisms and judgments have nothing to do with you, 3) remind yourself that you are physically safe. Much of our addiction is tied to an overactive nervous system that prevents us from departing from the fight or flight emotions.
When we’re drinking, there is no time left to create, to explore, to discover, to get to know, or reflect upon. Instead, we are picking up the pieces, sometimes trying to put the pieces together from the night before. Much of this behavior is the body seeking safety and refuge from situations that may have occurred decades ago. Relax and let your inner guidance take over. https://www.recoveryelevator.com/meditations/
Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
[11:29] Rocio took her last drink August 31, 2020. Rocio is married with three sons and lives in Edmonds, WA. Rocio had an abusive marriage and had the courage to leave her marriage. Her drinking wasn’t a huge issue until the last 6 years. As her kids started to grow, she became part of the mommy wine culture and alcohol was part of everything from sports events to PTA meetings and family gatherings.
She noticed she was starting to plan around events. Her husband was concerned, and always approached her with an attitude of help. Rocio didn’t have a turn-off switch and she had some self-sabotaging characteristics. She described that hamster wheel of parenthood, work, and fun. Alcohol helped her numb.
Breaking her hip at a bike race became a turning point. She didn’t stop drinking but had to learn to walk again and the recovery took a year. Rocio was sober curious and did several dry January’s. During a family vacation, she had some great insights about the role alcohol played in her family including some questions from her son. About six months into sobriety, she started to get real clarity on her relationships and how she thinks. Connection, accountability, quit lit, boundaries and self-care were great tools. Her marriage is amazing, and she has great support.
Odette’s Summary
Odette reminds us to protect our energy during the holiday season. Give yourself permission to take care of you.
Sponsor: Exact Nature exactnature.com Code: RE20
Holiday 2021 AF Survival Guide
Upcoming events, retreats, and courses:
Resources
Connect with Cafe RE - Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY to waive the set-up fee.
Recovery Elevator YouTube - Subscribe here!