Today we have Mike. He is 50 years old and from Cleveland, OH and he took his last drink on August 9th, 2022.
This episode brought to you by:
Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored
Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20
We offer a free month in Café RE once per year. Starting this Wednesday October 1st, and if you sign up for Café RE during the month of October, you get a free month.
[02:59] Thoughts from Paul:
Paul shares with us that he recently heard a song by Cameron Whitcomb called “Quitter”, and it’s about his journey into sobriety.
One line says - “The hardest part of getting clean are all the damn philosophies telling me how this is supposed to work.”
We all want a manual and a clear pathway to healing. A set sequence of steps. And yes, there are The 12 Steps that have helped many. But not all.
Paul believes that there isn’t a manual by design. Recovery is all about recovering you and figuring out what makes you function optimally. Discovering what makes you happy. Could there ever be a one-size-fits-all philosophy or manual for that?
You’re supposed to explore different philosophies and go on a deep mission of exploration when recovering the self. We are tasked to heal and find out what philosophies work for us. We are on a mission to find what brings us joy. There isn’t a manual for that.
Whatever philosophy you choose, make sure it involves other people. An addiction wants you alone with a bottle. The antidote is connection. With other human beings, animals, plants and flowers.
Good news, your listening represents you coming closer to the fire. We’re putting aside our difference and coming together to heal. This is an incredible time to be alive.
[06:40] Paul introduces Mike:
Mike is 50 years old and lives in Cleveland, OH. He and his wife have been married almost twenty years and have two daughters, 16 and 18. For fun Mike enjoys a lot of outdoor activities with his family and enjoys reading.
Mike had plenty of exposure to alcohol while growing up but swore he was going to stay away from it. Sometime in his teens he got curious and decided to try it. He instantly had the “warm fuzzy” feeling but that didn’t trigger any concern. Mike continued to drink through his teens into his twenties, accumulating three DUIs by the time he was 25.
Mike learned his lesson not to drink and drive and straightened his act out a little bit. He and his wife both drank so they didn’t consider it problematic. Over time the nightly drinking increased and many times Mike would find himself drinking after getting home from events or get together.
Mike never tried to moderate his drinking, but he tried to keep it under control. Gradually he began losing interest in doing things that didn’t involve alcohol. When COVID happened, the drinking time would get blurred and soon Mike was known to always have a beer in his hand.
Mike’s wife didn’t like how much his was drinking but seemed to accept it for a while. He began to try and hide it, but he knew that she knew he was drinking. Mike knew the only way he was going to quit drinking was if his wife gave him somewhat of an ultimatum.
There was no rock bottom, Mike says. Work was still going well, and his family was doing well, but he knew he needed to change. Mike knew he needed to prove to himself that he could beat this and decided to give it a try. So far he is three years into that first try.
Mike says the first few days were tough but was committed to giving it a try. Mike did a lot of reading and listening to podcasts, started learning more about addiction and taking courses online. He has enjoyed learning about it all and thinks that we are all capable of more than we think. Mike says he feels too good to ever want to go back.
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
I love you guys.
Today we have Emily. She is 28 years old from Denver, CO and she took her last drink on April 25th, 2025.
This episode brought to you by:
Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored
Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20
Starting Wednesday, October 1st, if you sign up for Café RE you get a free month! Café RE is our alcohol-free community who recently got non-profit status and we’re all about having fun and kicking ass without alcohol.
[03:45] Thoughts from Paul:
Paul has said many times that quitting drinking was the hardest thing he has ever done, but that’s not true. Today he shares with us 20 things that are harder than quitting drinking.
This is the short list of what is harder than quitting drinking and Paul feels that it can all be summarized with this:
Continuing to poison yourself with alcohol is harder than quitting drinking and that’s exactly how we have to frame it. Regularly ingesting poison takes a bigger toll on your overall health than quitting drinking.
[10:14] Paul introduces Emily:
Emily is originally from Delaware but currently lives in Colorado with her boyfriend, two dogs and two cats. She works in tech sales and for fun she enjoys all things outdoors including skiing, backpacking, camping and has recently gotten some paddleboards and golf clubs.
Emily was against alcohol while growing up, began to experiment when she was 16 or 17. She thought it was a great way to escape the regimented lifestyle she was living.
In college, it was normal to drink from Thursday to Saturday. Emily didn’t see it as a problem because everyone around her was drinking the same way. She was able to maintain good grades and work multiple jobs while in college.
Emily was working in the bar and restaurant scene and decided to continue doing that after graduating. At age 23 Emily applied to work for a liquor supplier and got a job in Connecticut. When all of her bar tabs and Uber rides were being paid for and the way that alcohol is glamorized in the industry, Emily was never forced to see the negative impact her drinking was having on her life.
During the COVID pandemic, Emily was supplied with a lot of alcohol and the only thing she needed to do was make cocktail videos since everything was shut down. Her apartment complex became party central.
Soon after everything began opening back up, Emily was laid off by the company she worked for. She and her fiancé moved to Colorado where she got another job working in the wine and liquor industry. This company did not foot the bill for her drinking like the last one. Emily says she and her partner both drank heavily, and it was a toxic relationship. Once she ended that she decided that she was going to become a better version of herself but didn’t change any of her habits.
Emily met her current partner around age 26. She began to notice her drinking habits more around him because he does not drink much. Emily began trying to moderate during the week and then drinking like she wanted to on the weekends when she would blackout and suffer from hangovers.
Before going to her cousin’s wedding in April, Emily told herself she wasn’t going to get drunk. She ended up drinking more than she planned, and it was a disaster. The next morning when she woke up, she decided she needed to quit and immediately began burnings the ships with everyone she knew.
Emily threw herself into recovery by attending her first AA meeting, listening to podcasts, reading books and joining Café RE. Emily says that by quitting drinking she did lose a portion of herself, but it was a portion that she wasn’t happy with. Since quitting Emily says her sleep has improved, the mental clarity she has gained has been amazing and she is now able to trust herself.
Emily’s parting piece of guidance: tell people you love and trust. Lean on people, community is everything.
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up.
We can do this
Today we have Ty. She is 76 years old, lives in Bozeman, MT and she took her last drink on March 8th, 2008.
This episode brought to you by:
Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored
Café RE – THE social app for sober people.
[04:21] Thoughts from Paul:
Paul tells us that every time he goes into a retreat or event with RE, he asks the universe to send us a (safe) wildlife encounter. This past retreat in Bozeman was no different. This time, it showed up in the form of a bald eagle while we were spending time at the lake pavilion. After it flew in, it perched on a lone pine tree branch about 50 yards away from us where we admired it’s beauty and Ty, an avid birder, shared some facts about the bald eagle with the group.
Paul shared that while editing the interview he did with Ty, he noticed some background noise. Normally, he does his best to avoid this, but this time he welcomed it. You will hear in the background the sound of birds. He says it was if the universe sent the birds to support Ty.
[08:45] Paul introduces Ty:
Ty lives in Bozeman, MT with her husband Dan. She likes to hike (gently), watch birds and enjoys reading. She is technically retired but has been editing the RE podcast since episode 25.
Ty grew up with an alcoholic father in Fort Worth, TX. Her mother did not allow alcohol in the house, so her father was gone a lot. Ty didn’t drink much during high school due to the fear of her mother detecting it on her.
After she graduated, Ty got married to her boyfriend. That marriage didn’t last long because her husband was an alcoholic and became abusive. They divorced when she was 21. During that time Ty would go out with friends she worked with where they would drink together. She says her rebellion against her father came out in that time – it was the early 70’s filled with drugs and rock and roll.
Ty said she spiraled shortly after her dad died and went through a dark time. She sought help from the county health board and after they placed her on mood stabilizers, she started drinking less.
At age 26, Ty went to university where she chose doing well in school over drinking and partying. A month after graduating college, Ty had a baby. Her daughter had a lot of health and developmental issues, so she became a full-time caregiver for her throughout her 30s.
In her 40s, Ty met her current husband Dan, who does not drink. They moved to Bar Harbor, where Ty worked in the restaurant industry. This exposed her to fine wine, which she would enjoy at home after work, while her husband was sleeping. Ty says red flags began to show when she switched to vodka because it has less calories. She began to hide her bottles and drink in secret.
Moderation for Ty was when she would quit drinking for Lent. One year she found that she wasn’t able to which got her thinking more about her drinking. She was attending Al-Anon meetings but was interested in the literature for AA. After taking some quizzes to determine if she was an alcoholic, she started to believe she might be.
The next morning while in church, Ty says she prayed: “I can’t do this will you help me”. That evening she went to her first AA meeting where she introduced herself as an alcoholic. It was the first time she had said it to herself or anyone else.
Ty says she burned the ships early on. Honesty and openness became very important to her. She knew she had to do the work and became comfortable asking her husband for support in various ways. AA has been a big part of Ty’s recovery story since the beginning. She has witnessed a lot of growth and change in the recovery world since quitting. Joining RE opened up so much for her and she says her toolbox expanded in terms of resources and learning different things.
Ty’s parting piece of guidance: it’s harder to get sober than it is to stay sober.
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
Today we have David. He is 51 years old, lives in Pinson, TN and took his last drink of alcohol on December 23rd, 2024.
This episode brought to you by:
Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored
Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20
We have a great lineup of events and courses coming to Recovery Elevator. A mindfulness course is coming up in October, then Dry January as well as a beginner ukelele course are happening in January. In February we have our first AF Songwriting course and later in the month our weeklong sober travel trip to Costa Rica.
[03:11] Thoughts from Paul:
In today’s intro Paul shares with us some statements he heard from Steven Glover (aka Steve-O from Jackass) who celebrates 17 years in recovery this year. Steve-O said that alcoholics are in a sense lucky because unlike other diseases where the best one can hope for is to return to a pre-illness state, when addicts and alcoholics treat their disease, they have the potential to become better versions of themselves.
In Paul’s upcoming book Dolce Vita, he makes the point that addiction is almost a biological mechanism to help wake us up as humans. On the other side of the addiction, if we are to heal, then we have to build a life that is more oriented towards helping others, where we are to be more authentic and where we are to admit when we are wrong in life.
One of the biggest mistakes that people make when they quit drinking is they just quit drinking. Although this is a huge step in the right direction, if this is all you do it leads to the concept of being a dry drunk. You need to address the reasons you drank to excess in the first place.
By listening to a sobriety podcast, you are doing the work. You’re investing in your recovery, and you are not a dry drunk. Your potential of becoming better than before is becoming a reality. And what wonderful timing you have as the world needs your honesty, your authenticity, your smile and your service more than ever.
[08:16] Paul introduces David:
David is 51 years old and was born and raised in West Tennessee. He has three adult children with his wife of 31 years. For work, he manages a manufacturing facility and for fun he is a lifelong musician and also enjoys genealogy and cemetery preservation.
David is the youngest of four children. He says his mother was a teetotaler and his father had a drinking problem, but it had tapered down a lot by the time David came along. David says he was raised in the country and had a small group of friends that his mother would say weren’t the best influences, and David was more of a follower than a leader and he and his friends would experiment with alcohol when he was younger.
When David was 18, he met his wife. They got married in David’s early twenties and began having kids. At this point, David didn’t drink often, and his wife didn’t drink at all. It wasn’t until their thirties that they would start having the occasional bottle of wine in the house.
In his late thirties, the drinking began ramping up. David began to have a regular music gig that was 45 minutes from home. He began going to have dinner and beers before the gig and over time started going out again after the gigs as well. He began drinking more on the weekends and that eventually crept into every day while isolating.
After some negative health reports in 2019, David began to try and address his drinking and says it was like a hamster wheel. By 2021, he knew he wanted to pursue an alcohol-free life and shared this with his wife, who has been very supportive of him.
Since his last drink in 2024, David says all of his relationships have improved, his bass playing has improved, and he started college last year and will be graduating soon. David is looking forward to continuing his personal growth, learning to meditate and travel.
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
Today we have Odette. She’s 37 years old, lives in San Diego, CA and she took her last drink 486 days ago.
This episode brought to you by:
Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored
Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20
Registration is open for our next retreat in Costa Rica. That’s February 21st – 28th, 2026 in Guanacaste, a Blue Zone. We are over halfway full, but we have seven spots left.
[03:09] Thoughts from Paul:
When 17 people send Paul an article in the span of 2-3 days, he knows it means something big just came out… and this one is big because it disarms one of the biggest reasons why it’s so hard to quit drinking: everyone else is drinking. Which is no longer true. Several publication released this article and here’s the link for the CBS article.
It says - only 54% of U.S. adults say they drink alcohol, a record low.
There is a growing belief that even moderate alcohol consumption is a health risk which is 100% correct. In 2015 28% of Americans though this but now in 2025, that percentage has almost doubled to 53%.
While mostly younger Americans are driving this trend, but older Americans are getting on board as well and the alcohol industry is tanking. Paul says that he can’t help but feel that we all have had a part in this. That we, including you, the listener, have saved lives by doing our part getting the proper messaging out about alcohol, and people are listening.
So, you’re not the only one who doesn’t drink. Paul doesn’t drink, Odette doesn’t drink and 46% of Americans don’t drink either.
[07:57] Paul introduces Odette:
In addition to being interviewed on episodes 128 and 231, Odette was the podcast host from episode 277 to 378.
Odette is from Guadalajara, Mexico but has been living in San Diego, CA with her husband, two kids and a variety of pets. She works in operations for a company called Chosen Foods. Around a year ago, she began teaching breathwork as well. For fun, she and her family enjoy being outside, especially at the beach.
Odette shares that addiction runs in her family, her father, who recently hit 16 years sober, went into rehab when Odette was 18. At the time she was struggling with an eating disorder and clinical depression. She never expected alcohol to be a problem for her.
Odette moved to the US with her husband after she graduated college. She kept her eating, and depression issues a secret for about a year after they got married but ended up going into treatment for it because she knew she needed to be healthy in order to have kids.
After having their first child, Odette says that she fell into the “mommy wine culture” pretty quickly. Playdates included toys for the kids and wine for the moms. Over time she began to look forward to drinking but there was always a knowing that this wasn’t her authentic self, she says. The drinking helped her feel like she fit in.
The drinking and her eating disorder didn’t play well together. She found the lines getting blurry and she wasn’t listening to her body as well as before. Since she didn’t drink much, she wasn’t sure she really had a problem, but it was all taking a toll mentally.
During the time Odette was hosting the RE podcast, her grandmother got sick. She lives far from her family and the uncertainty of the situation and pain of not being there was too much for her. Even with all of her tools, Odette found herself relapsing. She struggled with the shame of it and felt a little lost but leaning into the community and learning how to accept herself has been important to getting her footing back.
Odette says recovery isn’t about fixing yourself, it’s about accepting all of the things that you are. Breathwork has been helpful for Odette to learn how to get back in touch with her body and be present.
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up.
I love you guys.
