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Recovery Elevator

It isn't a NO to alcohol, but a YES to a better life! Best selling author Paul Churchill, along with Kristopher Oyen interview people who have stepped away from alcohol in their own lives. Each week this podcast does a deep dive into an exploration of what a booze free life might look like from various perspectives and opinions.  If you are sick and tired of alcohol making you sick and tired, we invite you to listen to Recovery Elevator. Check out what an alcohol free life can look like as others share their own stories of sobriety. If you are sober curious, newly sober, supporting a loved one or living your best life already in recovery, then you are in the right place. This podcast addresses what to do if you’re addicted to alcohol, or if you think you’re an alcoholic. Other topics include, does moderate drinking work, does addiction serve a purpose, what happens to the brain when we quit drinking, should you track sobriety time, is A.A. right for you, spirituality, and more. Similar to other recovery podcasts like This Naked Mind, the Shair Podcast, and the Recovered Podcast, Paul and Kris discuss a topic and then interview someone who has ditched the booze.
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Now displaying: Category: Self-help
Mar 23, 2020

Renee took her last drink January 2, 2020.  This is her story.

If you have ever wanted to attend a Recovery Elevator event you should get yourself to Denver in June for the Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - June 11-14th, 2020.  This event will be, essentially, the closeout event for Recovery Elevator.  You can find more information about our event here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about Rule 22.  What it is.  Why it is important to make this rule a part of your life ASAP. 

Rule 22 = Lighten up.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Laughter really is the best medicine.  Life is never as serious as the mind wants us to believe. 

 

[12:00] Paul introduces Renee. 

 

Renee is 40 years old and live in Greendale, WI.  She is a hair stylist and is currently working at a children’s hair salon.  She is married and they have 2 kids, a 10-year-old and a 7-year-old.  Renee also has a 20-year-old son from a previous relationship.  For fun Renee likes to hike, camp, go on vacations, paddleboard and jigsaw puzzles. 

 

[17:25] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Renee started drinking as a teenager, around the age of 15.  She says she did it to fit in and have fun.  She met her husband, in a bar, in her early 20s and they pretty much drank together every weekend.  It wasn’t until 2007 that Renee started drinking more than just on the weekends.  After getting married they were drinking 3-4 days out of the week.  Renee got pregnant early on and while she couldn’t drink due to being pregnant, her husband continued to drink.  That made Renee mad because she wanted to drink.  Renee did start drinking again, in the hospital, after giving birth to her children. 

 

 

[20:30] Was drinking again, as soon as you had your baby, something that you had pre-planned? 

 

Renee said she could not wait to drink after her baby was born.    She did the same exact thing during and after her 2nd pregnancy a few years later.    

 

[24:18] Why do you think your husband came clean about his drinking?    

 

Renee said he told her because he couldn’t do it anymore.            

 

[24:40] What was your response?

 

Renee was pissed off when he first told her.               

 

[28:35] When did you both recognize that alcohol was almost the driving divider?

 

Renee says it was in October of 2019 when her husband told her about his drinking.  They started to put all the pieces together and realized that everything bad that had happened between them was caused by alcohol, in some way, or somehow.    

 

[30:40] Has there been a moment when one of you was about to drink and you had that conversation where you lean on each other, and you both made it through?

 

Renee said yes, that there had been a couple of those moments. 

 

[30:05] Was January 2 a planned date?

 

Renee said yes, it was a planned date.  She went to work that day and was cutting hair with shaky hands. 

 

[35:40] How did you get through the last 45 days? 

 

Renee says that they bought a new treadmill, have been binge watching Netflix, just finding things to keep their minds off of it.  But that it was really hard at first. 

 

[38:53] How has working with a counselor helped with your anxiety and depression?

 

Renee says it helped a lot.  She didn’t have any anxiety after the first couple weeks.  It just started to get a little better and better until now, when she says she has none.      

 

[40:40] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

I realized that alcohol has basically affected everything in my life. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

Recently we got a lot of snow here and we took the kids sledding. 

 

  1. What is some advice you’d give to your younger self?

 

To try and surround myself with people who aren’t party people. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

Well definitely your podcast, lots of reading. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in a life without alcohol?

 

We want to do a lot more traveling. 

 

  1. What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

If you are thinking about drinking, or if you are thinking that you drink too much, you probably do. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

You do a drunken cartwheel and wake up in the morning to find your whole hand is black and blue because you broke your middle finger. 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about our event here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – You took the elevator down, you have to take the stairs back up.  You can do this.”

 

 

 

Mar 16, 2020

Janine took her last drink on October 6, 2019.  This is her story.

If you have ever wanted to attend a Recovery Elevator event you should get yourself to Denver in June for the Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - June 11-14th, 2020.  This event will be, essentially, the closeout event for Recovery Elevator.  You can find more information about our event here.

On today’s episode, Paul talks about your comfort zone, why it’s important to have one, why it is so important to get outside of it, and how it is possible to get too far out of it.  The true authentic you doesn’t exist in your comfort zone.  Stepping outside your comfort zone even once, makes it easier that you’ll do it again. 

As for ditching the booze, here are some strategies in regards to the comfort zone.  Instead of quitting forever, aim for one day, or 50% of the days in a month.  Burning the ships?  Go at your own pace.  90 meetings in 90 days too much, aim for 1 a week, then 2 a week.   

 

[20:00] Paul introduces Janine. 

 

Janine is 32 years old and is from Pensacola, FL.  She is married and has a 9-month-old daughter.  Janine is a former kindergarten teacher.  For fun she likes to go to the beach with her family, walking her dog and spending time with her daughter. 

 

[24:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Janine took her first drink when she was 17-years-old and she immediately loved the feeling it gave her.  Through college she feels she drank like every other college student.  Janine says her drinking didn’t take off until she started her teaching career, and that gradually over the years she was drinking more and more. 

 

When she met her husband, and knew that it was something serious, she says she knew that she was going to have to do something about her drinking.  

 

 

[26:45] Talk to us about the methods you used to try and control your drinking. 

 

Janine said she tried them all.  Switched from liquor to wine/beer.  Still getting backout drunk after switching to wine she tried drinking a glass of water after every glass of wine.  Not drinking during the week, but even when that worked, she was still getting blackout drunk all weekend.      

 

[28:15] Was there a time when fear came in and you didn’t think you could stop? 

 

Janine said yes, that that is exactly what happened.          

 

[30:30] Can you tell us a little about postpartum depression?

 

Janine said for her she felt like she lost some of her identity, her whole life now revolved around another human being.  She had days when she would look in the mirror and not even recognize herself.  Her emotions were all over the place.  Janine ended up going to her doctor and getting on antidepressants, but was still drinking.             

 

[35:00] Tell us what happened next. 

 

After trying to modify, by having no alcohol in the house, Janine said she went and bought 2 bottles of wine and drank them one night after the baby was in bed.  She got blackout drunk, sent strange texts, and spent the next day crying and filled with anxiety.  She couldn’t deny it anymore, she knew she had a problem and couldn’t control it. 

 

Later that day her dad, a recovering alcoholic himself, called Janine.  She says his first words were, “I just felt I needed to call and hear your voice.”.  Janine said she just lost it and opened up to him for the first time.      

 

[40:30] What was that first AA meeting like and what happened after that?

 

Janine said she was terrified to go that first meeting, but that after the meeting people came up and were very friendly.  She said she was also comforted by the fact that there were other teachers there.  She was still feeling like her life was over that first week.    

 

[44:14] Was there a challenging moment when you wanted to drink, and how did you get past it?

 

Janine said she had several in the beginning.  She said when those times came up, she would call a friend, or call her sponsor. 

 

[45:25] How has the relationship with your husband changed? 

 

Janine says her husband fully supports her and has also quit drinking.  She feels like their relationship has gotten a lot deeper.       

 

[54:30] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

I would say when I made that last attempt to control my drinking by not having alcohol in my house

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

Spending my daughter’s 1st Christmas completely sober. 

 

  1. What’s your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I am a big fan of water. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

I enjoy this podcast; I don’t get to attend AA meetings as much as I would like but I also enjoy reading. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in a life without alcohol?

 

I am actually thinking about taking up blogging. 

 

  1. What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

If you know in your heart that you can’t control your drinking anymore, don’t listen to the lies that your mind is telling you. 

 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

You get blackout drunk while watching Dateline. 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about our event here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Mar 9, 2020

Aaron took his last drink October 6, 2019.  This is his story.

If you have ever wanted to attend a Recovery Elevator event you should get yourself to Denver in June for the Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - June 11-14th, 2020.  This event will be, essentially, the closeout event for Recovery Elevator.  You can find more information about our event here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about it being possible for things to coexist in your life, you can feel calm and accomplished while you still have things to do.  It is important to recognize both parts equally.  When you are in the middle of a tough emotion you can chose to ride it out on the surface, which would be the mind, or deep down, which would be the belly area of the body.  Do you best to get out of the mind and stay in the belly, preferably with belly breaths.   

 

[13:00] Paul introduces Aaron. 

 

Aaron is 54 years old and lives in Pittsburgh, PA.    He is a chiropractor and loves health, fitness and exercise.  Aaron has a 65-acre farm and plays rugby. 

 

[17:50] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Aaron didn’t drink until his dad passed away from heart failure when Aaron was a junior in college.  His friend left some wine coolers at his house and he decided to give them a try and he liked the way they made him feel.  He continued to drink through college and alcohol made him the life of the party. 

 

Aaron moved to Florida after graduation, he was 21 years old and had a teaching degree.  He was only drinking on the weekends at this time and started playing rugby.  He says drinking and rugby go hand in hand. 

 

Aaron graduated from chiropractor school and continued to only drink on the weekends.  This was his drinking pattern through his 30s and 40s.  It was in his late 40s that he realized that he hadn’t gone a week without drinking, even if it was only on the weekends.  He thought he might have an issue with alcohol but he didn’t think it was a big deal. 

 

[29:55] Talk to us about how you tried to hide it before you fully got on board on stopping. 

 

Aaron says that this went on for years.  He was hiding beers in cereal boxes.  He was waking up in the middle of the night with pounding headaches.  Aaron said his wife started to notice what he was doing and started to call him out.  He started getting sick and having headaches after just 2 beers.    

 

[33:33] Get us up to speed to before your sobriety date. 

 

Aaron says in 2018 he stopped drinking for 6 months, but then at a bar one night said, “I got this.”, and had an IPA.   That started another year of drinking for Aaron.  In October of 2019 he said he has got to stop (drinking) and that time he meant it.        

 

[39:22] What has been working for you these last few months?

 

Aaron said he listened to the Recovery Elevator podcast.  He told his wife and kids.  Aaron has started to tell other people that he just isn’t drinking anymore.           

 

[42:05] What has been the biggest thing you have learned about yourself along the way?

 

Aaron says he thinks he saw himself as being compulsive and having a problem and then thinking he can break the problem.    

 

[47:40] What got you through your brother’s death without taking a drink? 

 

Aaron said he had no desire to drink at all, he knew that his brother’s death was caused by alcohol.  He no longer has a mental or physical desire for alcohol.      

 

[51:30] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

When I saw my kids drinking and having problems that I had. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

When we go out to restaurants and I order water with lemon.

 

  1. What’s your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Seltzer water. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

I only have one, I listen to Recovery Elevator over and over and over. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in a life without alcohol?

 

I just want to have family functions without beer. 

 

  1. What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Just keep listening.

 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

When you are having drinks out at the restaurant and you go to the bathroom and your pee is clear and you say to yourself, yes…it’s kicking in, because you know now that the beer is kicking in.    

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about our event here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Mar 2, 2020

Tara took her last drink February 4, 2019.  This is her story.

On today’s episode Paul talks about the top 10 reasons for quitting drinking.  Number one; your authentic self will begin to emerge.  Number two; you don’t have a headache due to lack of aspirin in your system.  Number three; you’ll begin to find out who you aren’t.  Number four; you’re open to signs from the universe.  Number five; you can start to see the insanity of the mind.  Number six; your brain will start to produce regular amounts of melatonin.  Number seven; welcome back oxytocin.  Number eight; you’re part of something much bigger.  Number nine; you stop hoping.  Number ten; you have a chance to start working on the one big lesson you’ve signed up for in this lifetime. 

 

[19:15] Paul introduces Tara. 

 

Tara is 46 years old and lives in Seattle, WA.    She is a preschool teacher, founded her own preschool 25 years ago.  She is married to her high school sweetheart and has 2 adult children.  For fun Tara loves to dance.    

 

[22:30] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Tara says there were 3 scary moments that caused her to pause and think that alcohol could be a problem.  The first was when she was 15 years old and she was at a wedding and the bar was opened up to her.  This was a formal wedding and Tara jumped into the pool.  She was the only one in the pool. 

 

Tara’s second scary moment was also in high school.  She was at a party drinking hard alcohol and decided to get into the hot tub.  Tara says she got so sick that she threw up blood. 

 

Tara’s third scary moment came when she was in her forties and was on an annual girl’s trip to Palm Springs.  She drank like she normally did, with no off switch, and she fell and hit her head.  All Tara could think about when that happened is that that was how her dad died. 

  

[38:25] Talk to us about right before you quit drinking. 

 

 

Tara says she went to a party and started drinking, and instead of calming her anxiety like she felt alcohol usually did, her anxiety amped up.  It made her question how much she was going to have to drink to feel that ‘warm blanket’. 

 

[42:50] Your Dad is listening right now, what do you have to say to him?

 

Tara said she just wants to let her Dad know that she loves him, and she’s proud of him.      

 

[45:20] How did your relationship with your husband change after you quit drinking?

 

Tara says that her bond with her husband is even stronger and deeper now.        

 

[49:00] What has been your biggest challenge this last year?

 

Tara says is the ones that kind or catch you out of nowhere.    

 

[50:40] What’s an excuse you used to tell yourself of why you couldn’t quit drinking? 

 

Tara said it was telling herself that she didn’t drink every day or that she didn’t drink by herself.    

 

[51:20] What are your thoughts on relapse? 

 

Tara says that on a personal level she doesn’t see it happening to herself.    

 

 

[54:40] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

I’m happier without alcohol.

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

A trip to Costa Rica and no drinking whatsoever.

 

  1. What’s your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I like iced tea or Bubly water with a little mint in it. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

I love to listen to your podcast, and many others.

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in a life without alcohol?

 

A lot more travel, and I hope to go to Thailand.

 

  1. What parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Just stick with it. 

 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

        

You put a bikini on at a formal wedding and jump into the pool when nobody else is in the pool.    

 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about our event here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Feb 24, 2020

Vinny took his last drink 9 ½ years ago.  This is his story.

On today’s episode Paul talks about change.  Whether you like it, or not, you are always changing.  You’re either building new circuits or adding new blockages to your energy field.  With an addiction it’s either gaining momentum or you’re lessening the energetic bonds of the addiction.  You must make time to always do the work. 

 

[15:45] Paul introduces Vinny. 

 

Vinny is 61 years old and lives in Bangkok.  For fun Vinny like to read, watch a good TV series, going to meetings and helping people.    

 

[19:20] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Vinny discovered alcohol in his late teens and continued to use it for 10 years. The next 10 years involved alcohol and smoking marijuana.  He added crack to the mix and became a crack addict for the following 5 years.  He went to 2 treatment centers and didn’t get clean until 2004.  He hit his bottom while living (homeless) in Las Vegas.  He managed to get sober after that and it lasted 3 years. 

  

[22:45] What in your message you want to get out?

 

Vinny says that recovery can be simple.  Simple means it’s not complicated.      

 

[27:13] How can thinking get us into more trouble?

 

Vinny says that most of us do not think, or see, very clearly.  He says we act based on the false evidence we see in front of us, so obviously if we are not relating to reality, we are always going to make the wrong choices.    

 

[30:05] What do you see is the biggest challenge that someone on this journey will face?

 

Vinny says he thinks that people have the illusion that they have to do it all themselves.      

 

[38:05] What do you think addiction is and where do you think it comes from?

 

Vinny says he doesn’t know where addiction comes from, and that it doesn’t matter. 

 

[44:00] Talk to us a little bit about self-loathing. 

 

Vinny says self-loathing is shame. 

 

[46:35] Talk to us about burning the ships and being honest with others. 

 

Vinny says that sometimes we are not even aware that we aren’t honest with ourselves. 

 

[52:30] Do you think that someone can become recovered?

 

Vinny says if you want to use the word recovered in the present moment, yes.  If recovered means you are cured, then no. 

 

[54:50] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Pepsi-Cola 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

The energy here at my job, on a Saturday afternoon, seeing 30 recovering people connect with each other.

 

  1. What’s some of the best advice you’ve ever received?

 

Don’t take yourself too seriously. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Take responsibility for yourself. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

You are a healthcare provider and you are taking care of somebody that needs you, and you have ran out of booze at 3 o’clock in the morning, and you abandon him and go and get booze. 

 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

ZipRecruiter

This episode is brought to you in support by ZipRecruiter. Right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free. Visit Ziprecruiter.com/elevator

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Feb 17, 2020

Sofi took her last drink on April 28, 2014.  This is her story.

On today’s episode Paul talks about tough love.  If you are saying you want to quit drinking…but…”you can’t because…fill in the blank ”, or “you can’t because you don’t want to…fill in the blank”, in other words, you want to quit but don’t want to put in the work, well here’s some tough love for you…that doesn’t work. 

 

[11:00] Paul introduces Sofi. 

 

Sofi is 30 years old and it from London.  She has 4 older sisters.  For fun Sofi enjoys exercise and hanging out in nature while listening to podcasts. 

 

[15:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Sofi says she has always had an addictive personality.  With alcohol Sofi noticed a change around the age of 14.  She was at a boarding school so all her drinking took place on the weekends.  Sofi says that the wheels came off when she went to university.

 

Freshman year she was going out every night. By her 2nd year of university, when most of her friends had slowed down, Sofi continued her drinking ways. 

 

Sofi never finished university and at the age of 21 was in her fist rehab.  That began a revolving door for the next 4 years…rehab, relapse, rehab, relapse. 

  

[21:00] 13 treatment centers, was there ever a time when you just felt like the next one wasn’t going to work?

 

Sofi says she liked rehab.  She liked that when she was there, she met people that thought like she did.      

 

[25:50] What does ‘you can’t think your way out of this problem’ mean to you?

 

Sofi said she had learned all the tools in all of her rehab stays, but because she didn’t know how to use them, she kept relapsing and going back.  It wasn’t until she had a moment of clarity that it all came together and made sense. 

 

[31:15] Talk to us about what you learned in those first 3 years, and then in the 2 years after that.

 

Sofi says she was learning to live through the highs and lows during the first 3 years.  She also learned, through the AA community, that she wasn’t such a bad person and how to make things right with her family.  The biggest thing that Sofi has learned, and is still learning, is that she does not need to punish herself.    

 

[34:05] How do you address self-loathing?

 

Sofi says she at the place where she accepts herself, most of the time.    She tries to treat herself as she would treat someone else. 

 

[36:15] Talk to us a little bit about your experience here at Hope Rehab.

 

Sofi says it is such a fun environment.  Hope Rehab is teaching people how to enjoy life sober.  There is a big emphasis on exercise. 

 

 

[41:15] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What is a memorable moment, that a life without alcohol, has given you?

 

Going on holiday with my family again, for the first time sober.

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Hard to narrow it down, but anything sour. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

It’s easily other people. 

 

  1. What’s on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I’m living it now, going around the world and seeing as much of it as I can. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Stay connected. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

You have started drinking secretly.   

 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Hope Rehab

https://www.hope-rehab-center-thailand.com/

 

BetterHelp 

Visit betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR and join the over 500,000 people talking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Recovery Elevator listeners get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Feb 10, 2020

Lisa took her last drink on December 16, 2017.  This is her story.

On today’s episode Paul talks about moderate drinking, and whether or not it works.  For almost everyone, when we first decide to quit drinking, we try to moderate.  The question isn’t, can I still have alcohol in my life, but…do I want to be a moderate version of my authentic self?

Are there success stories of moderate drinking?  Sure.  But they don’t work out in the long run. 

 

[18:30] Paul introduces Lisa. 

 

Lisa is from Minneapolis, Minnesota.  She is 40 years old and has 2 kids, a 21-year-old and 18-year-old.  Lisa has been a single mom for 13 years.   She is a RN and does patient care part time and education full time.  For fun Lisa loves going to the gym, and when the weather is nice, she likes to hike.      

 

[22:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Lisa started drinking at the age of 14.  She wasn’t a huge drinker, but whenever she could drink, she did, and she always wanted to get wasted.  At 27 she was newly divorced with 2 kids, and had come out of a very unhealthy relationship.  Sad and depressed she moved in with her parents and that’s when her drinking ramped up. 

 

Fast forward to 2017, at 37 years old, her son has left for college and she is feeling a little empty nest syndrome, is sad, is drinking and blacking out every weekend.  Her last month of drinking she was drinking and driving, hanging out with people she wouldn’t normally hang out with, drawing lines in the sand and quickly going over them. 

 

On December 17, 2017, she was up north with her twin sister, was nursing a really bad hangover, and says she looked at her sister and said she was done. 

 

Within the following week Lisa had called a girlfriend who took her to 3 AA meetings by the end of that week. 

 

[28:38] Was there a moment of clarity?

 

Lisa says yes.  She went up north with her sister to see a Christmas light show, still extremely hungover and getting sick during the ride, and as she got out of the car and saw the convention center, she just knew she was done.  Within an hour of saying she was done drinking Lisa says her spirit felt lighter.    

 

[32:35] What roll has your sister played on this journey?

 

Lisa says her sister has played a vital role, and that her sister herself is 1 year sober.  At 3 months sober Lisa, sitting in her closet crying, called her sister who gave her the advice she needed to hear…to not “go back out” (drink). 

 

[36:30] Talk to us about how you did it, what’s working for you?

 

Lisa works a 12-step program and has a sponsor.  She says that really early on she would look for ladies at meetings that had smiles on their faces.  If she was asked to do something, she did it, she volunteered at a lot of events.  Lisa loves bringing meetings into a detox.  She also surrounds herself with friends that don’t drink. 

 

[45:45] What did you expect sobriety to feel like, and what does it actually feel like?

 

Lisa says she didn’t expect life to be like it is.  She expected her life at 2 years sobriety to be top notch.  She catches herself being resentful that she doesn’t have all that she expected would come with 2 years sobriety, but when she focuses on all she does have and all that God has given her, her life looks a lot prettier.    

 

 

[52:30] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

When I saw the look in my daughter’s eyes when she thought I was drinking again. (Lisa was drinking a mocktail.)

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Club soda with cranberry and a splash of lime.

 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources?

 

The Recovery Elevator podcast, the RE Facebook group, making connections with people in Minnesota, AA and I sponsor a couple women. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Don’t take yourself so damn seriously. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

If you are talking to the bartender, who you know is sober, about how much you want to quit drinking, at bar closing while intoxicated. 

 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

The book, Alcohol is Sh!t, is out.  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

ZipRecruiter

This episode is brought to you in support by ZipRecruiter. Right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free. Visit Ziprecruiter.com/elevator

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Feb 3, 2020

Andrew took his last drink on February 16, 2019.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about 2 things.  Number one is about how it is the simple things in life that matter the most.  Number two is, watch out for addiction whack-a-mole, or transfer addiction, with an emphasis on technology and smart phones. 

 

[16:15] Paul introduces Andrew. 

 

Andrew is 47 years old and lives in Sidney, AUS.  He is divorced and enjoys spending time by the water.      

 

[20:20] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Andrew was about 15 years old the first time he drank and he realized that, when he drank, he didn’t quite behave the same way as everybody else.  He says that he felt that alcohol calmed him down. 

 

[23:00] When did you first recognize that alcohol was causing more damage than good?

 

By age 19 Andrew had 4 drunk driving charges.  Andrew thought that spending 5 days in jail, after running through a roadside sobriety test, was a holiday because he had been working so hard. 

 

[24:30] How did you keep a lid on from age 19 to 46?

 

Andrew says he didn’t keep a lid on his drinking.  He managed to work really hard at the jobs he had, working in the restaurant business.  He says he was constantly getting fined at work, and driving to work drunk.  Andrew says he was allowed to get away with this behavior at work because the restaurants would be doing so well under his management. 

 

[35:20] Did you feel you still needed some field research after your ban from the grocery store?

 

Andrew says that this was the beginning of trying to find any way to get out from how he was.  He was swimming in the ocean but this behavior increased for the next 6 months.  After cutting his drinking back, but still drinking about 10 beers a day, he had a seizure, at the train station.  This led to a 5-day hospital stay. 

 

[44:10] What can you say to listeners out there that feel that they are too far gone?

 

Andrew says that there is no such thing as too far gone. 

 

 

[55:19] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Probably the first time I was told, you can have alcohol, or you can have everything else. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Meeting my girlfriend.    

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Sparkling water.

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I have one travel journey I’d like to take. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Seek out people who have already survived and listen to what they have to say. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

27 years after almost ran over a police officer on the side of the road you get banned from your local supermarket.   

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

BetterHelp 

Visit betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR and join the over 500,000 people talking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Recovery Elevator listeners get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Jan 27, 2020

Scott took his last drink on December 2, 2018.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

Registration is now open for the 2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind.  The event will take place June 11-13 in Denver, CO.  You can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about control.  He also talks about an article, by Anna Ronan Shaw, that he read.  The article is titled Addiction Isn’t a Sin, It’s an Adaption, and you can find it here.  Paul shares his take, that addictions represent part of our personalities that are in the most need of healing. 

 

[11:25] Paul introduces Scott. 

 

Scott is 48 years old and lives in Denver, CO.  He is a bicycle mechanic.  For fun Scott likes to ride bikes, exercise, and hang out with his dogs, Willie and Waylon.    

 

[22:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Scott started drinking in Jr. High/High School.  Within a couple of years Scott got 2 DUIs, 9 years later he got his 3rd DUI and lost his license for 5 years. 

 

In January 2004 Scott decided to go to rehab.  After making some phone calls he entered rehab on January 3, 2004, and stayed for 28 days.  Once out of rehab Scott immersed himself into recovery and AA.  In 2005 Scott was cleaning a family members house and found a vile of cocaine.  He says that within seconds he had it lined up, and up his nose.  He looked at that relapse as a lesson, reminding him how powerless over drugs/alcohol he was.  He continued his AA and recovery journey. 

 

In 2008 Scott says he said the 3 most dangerous words an alcoholic can say, “I got this”.  He gradually left the support of his AA community and the farther away he got the emptier his “sobriety toolbox” got. 

In 2012 Scott bought his first house and thought it would be cool to sit on his porch and drink NA beers.  Because of his 2 surgeries, and not liking pain pills, Scott started to smoke pot to help the pain.  In October of 2013 Scott’s father got in a really bad bicycle accident.  In the ambulance ride to the hospital with his father Scott saw a liquor store across from the hospital.  As soon as Scott’s father was settled in the hospital Scott headed for the store.  Without thinking about the 9 ½ years he had been alcohol free Scott got drunk that night. 

 

[32:33] What happened between then and 2018? 

 

Scott says his dad really never recovered from the accident.  He had multiple surgeries that were all unsuccessful.  On November 27, 2016, Scott’s father committed suicide.  After that Scott says he couldn’t use, or drink, enough.  He had no stop button. 

 

Scott sought out help from a therapist, who referred him to a doctor that agreed to help him stop drinking.  He prescribed meds that Scott waited a couple weeks before taking.  On December 3, 2018, Scott took his first benzo and hasn’t drank since. 

 

 

[48:45] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

I think when I finally surrendered.  When I accepted that I am an alcoholic and a drug addict, and that that’s not a bad thing. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

I would have to say that panel in Montana. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

A raspberry Italian cream soda with Topo Chico.

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I want to be a sponsor and I want to help newcomers at my meeting. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

There is no good day to start this, except today. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

           

You have a little bit left in a whiskey bottle and you decide to try to drink it all at once so you slam it down, and you throw up in your mouth and swallow that, and keep drinking the bottle and finish it. 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Care/of

For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code elevator50

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Jan 20, 2020

Bianca took her last drink on October 3, 2018.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

Registration is now open for the 2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind.  The event will take place June 11-13 in Denver, CO.  You can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about the process of rediscovering what you like to do, after ditching the booze, and to let it happen organically.  He encourages you to engage in activities where you find yourself in a ‘flow state’, or ‘in the zone’.    Instead of focusing on new hobbies and fun activities, try to find things where you almost lose yourself. 

 

[7:30] Paul introduces Bianca. 

 

Bianca is 22 years old and is from Austin, TX.  She recently graduated from college and is working for a temp agency while she looks for that full time job.  Bianca lives with her girlfriend.  For fun Bianca spends her time reading and in nature.    

 

[13:40] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Bianca didn’t really drink while in high school, but in college she went wild.    She tried to moderate during her freshman year by documenting everything she did that involved alcohol.  That didn’t work.  The following year, 2016, she started doing drugs along with drinking.  Bianca does not remember much from her junior year.  By the beginning of her senior year (2018) she had a lot of things on her plate and her drinking was still up there. 

 

Bianca says she had a lot of little rock bottoms that finally accumulated into her big rock bottom, which happened on October 3.

 

[17:40] What happened on October 3? 

 

Bianca and some friends went out to get something to eat.   What started out as just one drink escalated to the point that one of her friends took her wallet away from her.  They went to a liquor store after that, and Bianca ended up at home, alone, taking shots.  She met up with her friends a little later, still sneaking double shots.   Bianca stumbled home and after mixing more drugs with the alcohol she passed out.   The following morning she woke up hating herself.      

 

[25:00] What was that first month like?

 

On October 4th Bianca texted the hotline and did what they told her to do, she got rid of her booze and hid her drugs.  She says the first few days and nights were tough.  She would come home from class and cry.  She was having intense nightmares and the shakes.  She now feels like she gets a clarity upgrade every 3 months. 

   

[28:10] What was is like getting sober at 22?    

 

Bianca says she actually got sober at 21 and celebrated her 22nd birthday sober.   She says it was hard, that there is a big drinking culture in Austin, TX.      

 

[32:00] What was harder, coming out as gay, or as someone with a drinking problem??

 

Bianca says both were hard.  She came out as gay at a very young age.  The hard part about telling someone she had a problem with drinking was the shame she felt.            

 

[33:20] What are you working on right now?

 

Bianca says she is really working on her self-worth and showing up for herself.     

 

[36:20] Have you ever explored why you drank?

 

Bianca said she has explored that with her therapist.  She says growing up her family fell into the victims, of victims, of victims.  She wasn’t taught very good coping skills.    

 

[39:20] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That I’m responsible for my recovery and nobody else. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

The ability to really feel my emotions and to be surprised. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Water.

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Definitely my sponsor, for sure.  Meetings and AA literature. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Travel overseas sober. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

I would tell you all to slow down, as slow as you can go, and to feel your emotions. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You buy over $200 worth of alcohol and it is confiscated within 3 days by a good friend. 

 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

BetterHelp 

Visit betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR and join the over 500,000 people talking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Recovery Elevator listeners get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR

 

SkillShare

Get two months of premium membership for free at www.shillshare.com/elevator

That’s two whole months of unlimited access to thousands of classes for free.

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

 

 

 

Jan 13, 2020

Greg took his last drink on October 2, 2012.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

Registration is now open for the 2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind.  The event will take place June 11-13 in Denver, CO.  You can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about what happens to the dome when you stop drinking alcohol.  There is a long list of benefits of quitting alcohol, and the mental health aspects are just as important as the physical ones. 

In the first year away from alcohol, and beyond, neurons in the brain that no longer fire together, no longer wire together.  This means the neural connections that spark when we want to drink, or take a drink, begin to fade.  In time new neural connections are created that don’t involve alcohol.   

 

[9:40] Paul introduces Greg. 

 

Greg is 35 years old and from Orange County, CA.  Greg is an actor and has a 4-year-old daughter.  For fun Greg likes to go on adventures with his daughter and create music. 

 

[12:25] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Greg first started drinking alcohol as a social lubricant.  Alcohol made it easier to talk to people and deal with things that he had tried to avoid.  In the beginning Greg was more of a clown when he drank, but in his early to mid-twenties his drinking got out of hand.  He was no longer drinking for fun anymore; he was relying on it to get through the day. 

 

[19:07] Was there a time when you knew the gig was up but you didn’t know where to go for help, or how to stop? 

 

Greg said yes, that it was a really demoralizing moment involving alcohol and cocaine.  He woke up, went outside in the rain, chain smoked about 10 cigarettes, and knew he needed to talk to somebody.  He called his sister, and without giving it much thought, told her he needed help.  His sister was there 20 minutes later, and with Greg’s mom helped get him into a place.        

 

[20:55] What happened after that?

 

Greg entered a treatment center and white knuckled it the first two weeks, and then eventually the clarity started to come. 

   

[24:30] Talk to us about your experience after rehab.    

 

Greg said he surrounded himself with sober friends and family.  He started going to school and focused on that, and also stated going to meetings.  About 6 months out Greg got a job volunteering at a treatment center.  He said he stayed really busy with a lot of structure.     

 

[26:35] Why do you think it’s so hard for people to ask for help?

 

Greg said he thinks that it’s our pride that gets in the way a lot of the times.  Greg said he had a hard time asking for help because he felt that he would be a burden on someone and he didn’t want people to become resentful of him.          

 

[36:00] How could it affect us if we are always thinking about the past or the future?

 

Greg says if we are always thinking about the past we are going to tend to be depressed, and if we are always thinking about the future, we are going to tend to be anxious.  Either one just drags us down and we are not productive.     

 

[38:00] Why do you think addiction is higher in the entertainment industry?

 

Greg said that there are several reasons, one being that it is more readily available. 

 

[44:00] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Witnessing my daughter being born.

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

My trip to Argentina. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Yerba Mate Revel Berry. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

AA literature, online literature, stuff like that.         

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Seeing my daughter have kids. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You get married in a blackout.    

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Care Of

For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to www.TakeCareOf.com and enter the code elevator50

This episode is brought to you in support by Care/Of. For 25% off your first month of personalized Care/of vitamins, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the promo code ELEVATOR

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Jan 6, 2020

Kerri took her last drink on November 6, 2018.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

Happy New Year!  On January 1st the 4th Café RE group, UP, opened.    

2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind, will take place June 11-13 in Denver, CO.  Registration opens on January 8th, you can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about meeting the man he would stay with while in Mexico, hearing his story, and discovering they had a connection through the TEDx Talk that Paul gave.  You can find the TEDx Talk, I’ve been duped by alcohol, here

Paul also discusses a video he recently watched, an interview by Dr. Gabor Mate, (author of In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts).  Dr. Mate says if you want to look at what causes the addiction you have to look at the benefit of addiction.  That the greatest myth on addiction is that its genetic, the other myth around addiction is that it is a choice that people make.  You can watch the Dr. Gabor Mate video here

 

[10:14] Paul introduces Kerri.  (**Doing the shownotes for my own interview is awkward! **) 

 

Kerri just turned 50, is married, and lives in Redding, CA.  She has two adult daughters, that both have families, and is a grandmother to 4.  For work Kerri recently fell into a new career, as a baker, and does stuff for RE.  For fun Kerri loves to be outdoors, hiking, taking her 3 rescue dogs out, travel, and kayaking. 

 

[15:51] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Kerri started drinking in high school and was a black out drinker from the start.  A family move before 9th grade made Kerri very angry.  Alcohol helped her fit into a new school and she quickly became known as a partier. 

Kerri got married at 19, had her daughters right away.  She says that her and her ex-husband were problem drinkers throughout their entire 17-year marriage.  Kerri’s drinking really ramped up after her divorce. 

 

[17:00] How old were you when you realized you had a problem with alcohol? 

 

Kerri says that in high school she knew she didn’t drink like her friends, but that she didn’t care.  Alcohol got her out of her shell.    

 

[18:00] What happened after your divorce?

 

Kerri says her drinking ramped up and it got bad, really quick.  It was a big life change for Kerri, with the divorce, having to go out and find a job, and her daughters basically being out of the house.  She was drinking at home alone, blacking out every time. 

 

[23:35] How come you didn’t feel ready to do this interview?    

 

Kerri said she didn’t feel like she had anything worth sharing.  She said that has felt that way all her life. 

 

[26:23] Did you have a rock bottom moment?

 

Kerri said yes.  After getting her teaching credential later in life, which Kerri says was a dream job, she was fired from two teaching jobs as the result of her drinking.  Kerri surrendered her teaching credential.         

 

[31:00] Talk to us about how you did it the first weeks, first month.

 

Kerri said it was really hard, that she didn’t know what anyone (co-workers, parents) was told or what they knew.  Kerri was afraid to leave her house for fear of running into someone, she would grocery shop at 2:00 AM.  She said she was filled with so much anxiety that she didn’t know how she was going to come out of it the 2nd time around.  She went to a therapist for the first time.  She sought out and entered into a 90-day IOP program.    

 

[35:17] You’ve burned the ships on social media, what kind of response have you received?

 

Kerri said she has received nothing but support and encouragement, and she encourages everyone to do it. 

 

[37:50] Talk to us about the breakthrough you had at the Bozeman retreat. 

 

Kerri said she got much from the entire retreat but it was the Clarity Breathwork that really did it for her.  She said once she was able to stop paying attention to what was going on around her and just do her thing, she was able to experience something powerful that changed her. 

 

[44:38] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That I don’t have to live up to, what I think are, other people’s expectations.      

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

All these RE retreats, that is something I never would have imagined doing…taking off and meeting strangers. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I’m kind of boring, I really don’t do the mocktail thing, I’m a water drinker. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Definitely Café RE, these sober meetups, retreats and I listen to a lot of podcasts.         

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Travel, travel, and more travel.  I want to do a marathon. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

To recover, get sober, whatever you want to call it, your way.  Your way may be different than someone else’s, and to not worry about what other people think. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You wake up one morning with a broken ankle and you have no idea how you did it. 

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

SkillShare

Get two months free of classes with Skillshare at www.skillshare.com/ELEVATOR

BetterHelp 

Visit betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR and join the over 500,000 people talking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Recovery Elevator listeners get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/ELEVATOR

Skillshare

For two free months of premium membership visit www.skillshare.com/elevator

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Dec 30, 2019

Justin took his last drink on November 5, 2018.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On January 1st, 2020 the 4th Café RE group will open. 

2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind, will take place June 11-14 in Denver, CO.  You can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about manifestation, how you basically create your future with your thoughts.  We all do it, most often unconsciously.  

What is, and isn’t, possible isn’t your business, it’s nature’s business.  Your business is to thrive towards what you want; sobriety, the why.  To create what you want it must be clear in your mind, stay the course, make a commitment to this clear and coherent goal of quitting drinking. 

If you don’t know what you truly want, seek love and connection in the mind with thoughts.  Those two alone will blast through addiction. 

 

[14:25] Paul introduces Justin. 

 

Justin lives in Santa Cruz, CA.  He is a musician and has been playing music for about 22 years.  He is 31 years old.     

 

[17:27] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Justin says he got introduced to drugs and alcohol around the age of 16.  He says he always wanted just a little bit more than everyone else, and then he started mixing up the drugs and alcohol at the same time. 

 

Shortly after graduating high school Justin’s mother passed away and that sent him down a spiral.  He started to really abuse drugs and alcohol, waking up sick every morning and hardly able to function.  He realized that he needed to get help or he was going to die. 

 

[19:00] How old were you when you realized you needed to get help? 

 

Justin says it was around the age of 24 that he first really realized it, but that it wasn’t until the age of 27 that he really that he had thoughts of really quitting.   At 27 Justin realized he had to stop, and that he couldn’t stop. 

 

[19:43] What happened then?

 

One of Justin’s friends told him about the plant medicine ayahuasca.   Justin felt like he had to options, rehab or try the plant medicine.  He signed up for an ayahuasca ceremony. 

 

Within a couple hours of drinking the plant medicine the first night Justin says he had a life changing experience.  He was taken right to his mother’s death and says she was there with him, holding him.  After that experience that night Justin completely quit everything and was sober for 16 months. 

 

[23:20] What sneaky ideas did the thinking mind put in your head at 16 months?    

 

It was New Year’s Eve and Justin had the thought that he would just drink a couple drinks that night, and go back to his sobriety the next day.  What happened is he got black out drunk, doesn’t remember the night, and woke up sick. 

 

[24:38] How long did you go back out for, and what brought you back?

 

Justin said he went back out for 7 months, and then he did another ayahuasca ceremony, which brought him back.  At the time he felt that he needed the plant medicine to bring him back, but now he’s learning he can access that state of consciousness with yoga and meditation.       

 

[26:15] Get us up to speed to your sobriety date.

 

There very last night Justin drank he told himself that he needed to stop.  He started the night saying he would just drink one pint.  The one pint led to at least 10 more drinks and Justin found himself getting kicked out of the bar.  He got in his car, blacked out drunk, and sped away to the gym he goes to.  He walked into the gym with a 12 pack of beer, went to the locker room and started chugging them, and puking in the lockers.  Justin made a big scene and many other members were complaining about him.  He was asked to leave the gym, or they were calling the cops.  At the end of this night Justin woke up naked, covered in puke, in a bush in his yard, not remembering anything. 

 

[35:39] Talk to us about how you did it?

 

Justin said he called a therapist the next morning, to talk about rehab.  He was going to at least one AA meeting a day the first couple weeks.  He still goes to a meeting about once a week, but doesn’t feel that meetings help him as much as meditation and yoga.  Justin says a recent meditation cruise was the best trip of his life. 

 

[42:25] Talk to us about meditation. 

 

Justin says he feels that his alcohol abuse was led by feeling there was a hole, or emptiness, that he wanted to fill, or that he wasn’t enough.  He wanted to cover up all those thoughts with alcohol.  But now, he’s learned, that instead of covering up the thoughts he doesn’t want, to create the thoughts he does. 

 

[52:30] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

To love myself.    

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Meeting all these amazing people that are connected to the heart. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Probably water, honestly. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Plant medicine and YouTube.         

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Creating more music to help people heal. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

I would say to spend more time connecting to your heart and spirit. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You’re waking up naked, outside your house, on two hits of acid.      

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts from the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Dec 23, 2019

Val took her last drink on June 26, 2019.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On January 1st, 2020 the 4th Café RE group will open. 

2020’ Recovery Elevator LIVE event, Dancing with the Mind, will take place June 11-14 in Denver, CO.  You can find more information about our events here.

On today’s episode Paul talks about some recent events that he has gone through and why he ended up in Oaxaca, Mexico. 

While meditating this past June, Oaxaca; the name, the city, just showed up.  Shortly after that, Oaxaca started showing up in film, tv, Netflix episodes, the Internet, and a gift he received from his mom was from Oaxaca.  Paul says he then knew he had to travel to Oaxaca. 

Sobriety is your superpower, and an offshoot of that superpower is putting the body and mind in a state of calm. 

 

[12:00] Paul introduces Val. 

 

Val is 30 years old and is from Fort Collins, CO.  She works from home for a software company.  Val is married and is one of 5 children, and also has 4 step siblings.  For fun Val likes to golf, walk her dog, do crafty things, cook and enjoys the outdoors. 

 

[16:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Val started drinking around the age 14/15 in high school, usually just on the weekends.  In college her drinking became almost a daily activity, which was also the time she was prescribed Adderall.   During college Val worked at different bars, and continued working in the restaurant industry after college.  In a way, working at these places, validated Val’s drinking because she didn’t see herself as bad off as those she was serving alcohol to. 

Once out of college her drinking habit changed and she was drinking more at home, with her husband.  This, at the age of 24/25, is also when she started using her Adderall more than it was prescribed.  Adderall kept her productive even with a hangover. 

 

Around this same time Val says she started to realize that she (and her husband) might have a problem with alcohol and they started trying to moderate. 

 

[21:48] Half way through this year you both stopped drinking for a couple weeks, and then both relapsed, fill us in from there. 

 

Val says she was out of town when they relapsed, and that when she came back her husband was ready to be sober.  She said she would do the same, but it was because she was abusing her Adderall and it was keeping her high.  When she would run out of her Adderall she would start drinking again.   

 

[22:55] What was the tipping point for you?

 

Both Val and her husband started going to AA.  Val was going to meetings and meeting with her sponsor, but still drinking.  Her tipping point came one night while throwing out all the bottles she had been hiding.    

 

[25:45] Talk to us about what happened after that moment of clarity?    

 

Val says she stayed up all night and waited for her husband to wake up because she had to tell him she had been drinking.  It was a very emotional moment, he had known she was drinking, but he wanted her to make the decision to stop.  A couple hours later she emailed her doctor and told her what was going on and to stop prescribing her any medication.  Later that same day she also shared with family member and her sponsor. 

 

[27:40] What happened after you burned the ships?

 

Val says it created the accountability she needed, and she could no longer go back.        

 

[30:43] How has it been for you off the ADD meds?

 

Val says she doesn’t get her house as clean as she used to, but that she is a more whole person without them. 

 

[31:56] Talk to us about the last few months, has there been challenges, have you had cravings?

 

Val has had cravings, but says she doesn’t get them as often anymore.  Working from home can be triggering, and that is when Val plays the tape forward. 

 

[32:34] Walk us through a typical day.

 

AA is still a bog part of Val’s journey and she goes to 2-3 meetings a week.  She has worked all the 12 steps with her sponsor and just recently started to sponsor someone herself. 

 

Val tries to get up at the same time every day, take a walk, do a daily reflection, and then jump right into work.  Keeping a routine is really important to Val. 

 

[42:10] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That connection with other people is so important.    

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Every single day has been a memorable moment. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

LaCroix, any sparkling water, and my bad habit drink is the Redbull Pear Sugar-free. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Any, and all, podcasts I listen to.  I have read Annie Grace’s book, and your book Paul.  And I am an avid believer in AA.       

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Right now, my focus is on my job, and hopefully in the near future starting a family. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

If you are on the fence if you should stop drinking, then you should stop drinking. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You are literally drinking in your closet before you attend an AA meeting.      

 

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing with the Mind - in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

Recovery Elevator in Costa Rica: From Jungle to the Beach - October 8 - 18th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Hello Fresh

Get 9 free meals at www.hellofresh.com/recoveryfresh9 and use the promo code recoveryfresh9

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Dec 16, 2019

Wendy took her last drink on June 4, 2017.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On January 1st, 2020 the 4th Café RE group will open. 

There will be 2 in-person meetups in Australia this December.  If you would like more info or would like to RSVP please email info@recoveryelevator.com

On today’s episode Paul talks about incessantly thinking in the future, why we do that, what that leads to, and how to put that thinking beast back into the cage. 

When we are living in the future, we start to feel stress.  Once we recognize, and become aware of how often we are future tripping, we can no longer ignore it and the deprograming has already begun.  We deprogram first, then we reprogram. 

 

[13:45] Paul introduces Wendy. 

 

Wendy is 57 years old, married and lives in Sun City Center, Florida.  She has two sons and one grandson.  She works as a critical care nurse which she loves.  For fun Wendy loves to be out in nature, exercise, walk, and do yoga.  She also has a corgi and participates in dog shows. 

 

[21:45] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Wendy took her first drink at the age of 13.  After her parents split up, she became her dad’s drinking buddy.  She went from using food to stuff down her feelings, to using beer.  This continued through her teens, twenties and into her thirties.  But it was escalating and she was needing more and more to catch that buzz. 

 

[24:20] Was there a moment that you recognized it was ramping up?

 

Wendy says she definitely knew that it was getting problematic and that she was having side effects from it.  She says that although she didn’t get anything like a DUI, alcohol was taking up too much real estate in her mind.   

 

[25:55] When did you realize it was ramping up?

 

Wendy says it was in her early 50s.  She didn’t really have a rock bottom moment but says she woke up one day and said, “I am done.”  She says it was almost like she flipped a switch in her head.    

 

[39:00] What techniques work for you when you are feeling anxiety?    

 

When Wendy first quit drinking she started going to a phycologist, who really helped her in the beginning.  One of the things she taught her was HALT, and to never let herself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.  Wendy says she still follows that to this day. 

 

[42:20] How did you get through the first few months?

 

Wendy says she read a whole lot of quit lit.  She joined a support group on Facebook.  She has a sobriety tool box and she keeps full.      

 

[47:00] What are the differences between year one and year two?

 

Wendy says that year one really felt like survival, in a lot of ways, and how to be this new person.  Learning how to deal with things without alcohol as a buffer. 

 

Wendy says that the cool thing about year two is that so many of those triggers start to fall away.  She says she doesn’t have the voices whispering to her, telling her how great it would be to drink. 

 

[51:15] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That there is an entire world that doesn’t revolve around alcohol. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

The sunrises, being up with the sun and making that connection that life can be a beautiful thing without alcohol. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

LaCroix sparkling water. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Journaling as I mentioned before, I like coloring, artwork and gardening.  Having that tool box available in my mind.      

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Definitely more traveling. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

If you think you have a problem, you probably do. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You pee down your leg, at a gala, at a fancy hotel, because you’re so drunk you can’t wait to get up to the room, and you just act like nothing is wrong.      

 

Upcoming retreats:

Upcoming Events and Retreats. 

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

Recovery Elevator LIVE: Dancing With the Mind -  in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about our events here.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

This episode is brought to you by the smart shopping assistant Honey. Get Honey for free at www.joinhoney.com/elevator . Honey, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when you're shopping online

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Dec 9, 2019

Torey took his last drink on October 9, 2017.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On January 1st, 2020 the 4th Café RE group will open. 

There will be 2 in-person meetups in Australia this December.  If you would like more info or would like to RSVP please email info@recoveryelevator.com

On today’s episode Paul talks about what happens when a loved one quits drinking.  First off, relationships are tricky even when not exposed to addiction turmoil. 

It is important to remember that both parties need healing.  Here is some advice for the problem drinker in the relationship; remember communication is key and ask for help.  Here is some advice for the normal drinker in the relationship; first off, you can’t change the problem drinker, make sure you protect yourself and your energies, set boundaries. 

 

[13:30] Paul introduces Torey. 

 

Torey is 47 years old and lives in Bainbridge, WA and has 2 kids.  He has been married since 2000.   For fun Torey like fabricating and has been spending time finishing a lot of projects.  He enjoys spending time with his family and going to school functions. 

 

[18:00] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Torey grew up in a small Wisconsin town and in high school drank on the weekends because that’s what kids did.   After high school Torey continued binge drinking during his Coast Guard years.   After the Coast Guard Torey went to work in the maritime field and his drinking continued. 

 

Through the mid-nineties to 2010 the daily drinking continued and progressed. 

 

[22:40] What happened when you realized there wasn’t another kind of alcohol to switch to, to feel better?

 

Torey says his drinking was starting to be noticed and talked about.  He realized that his kids had probably never seen him without a drink in his hands.  When he started to hide his alcohol, he realized he might have a problem.  He tried to moderate, which never worked.  In 2015 things really ramped up.  Torey was depressed, waking up so hungover that he was calling in sick, avoiding things at work, and the connection with his family was dwindling. 

 

[25:40] When you realized you weren’t going to be able to make yourself stop did you seek outside sources? 

 

Torey says he knew he couldn’t fix things himself and that he needed to start listening to people around him.  On October 9, 2017, Torey’s wife made an appointment for them to see a counselor that knew about addiction. 

 

[28:20] Talk to us about that day. 

 

Torey says he knew where he could get the outside support, that he knew about AA, but didn’t go to a meeting for a couple days.  He started listening to podcasts.  He read Annie Grace’s book, This Naked Mind, and said that’s where it all came together for him.       

 

[32:30] When did you reach the moment when you thought, “I might be able to do this.”?

 

Torey says it was around day 14, he was out of town for work and looking for an AA meeting.  The feeling that he had something in common with the 8-10 people at the meeting made it all click.    

 

[35:50] What have been some of the challenges you’ve faced and resources you’ve implemented along your journey?

 

Torey said his first hurdle was avoiding people that he worked with that still drank heavily, and when he couldn’t avoid them, he had a plan in place.  He made sure he had things to do in the evening.  He found an AA home group and was going weekly.  When he would have a craving, he would follow the drink, knowing that it would never end with just that one drink.

 

[44:48] How did it feel when you reached the conclusion that alcohol no longer defines you?

 

Torey says he felt like he could be himself again.  He feels like he can be his true self.      

 

[47:35] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

When after having a panic attack he had to be honest with the doctor about how much he drank.    

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Anytime I can go on vacation with the family. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Definitely LaCroix, but I’ll drink any sparkling water. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Café RE, this group has been awesome, the AA community where I live, and reading more and more.    

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Finishing some major yard art I have started. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Dig deep.  If you are thinking you might have a problem, you probably do.  Listen to those around you, ask for guidance and help. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

A friend had given me a bottle of vodka with a bunch of peppercorns in it, and it was the last alcohol in the house and it wasn’t going to go down the drain.    

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

RE LIVE in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 Skillshare  - for two free months of instruction, go to www.skillshare.com/elevator

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Dec 2, 2019

Dee took her last drink on January 17, 2019.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On January 1st, 2020 the 4th Café RE group will open. 

There will be 2 in-person meetups in Australia this December.  If you would like more info or would like to RSVP please email info@recoveryelevator.com

On today’s episode Paul talks about PAWS, or what he refers to as ‘healing symptoms.  You can find a YouTube video on these healing symptoms, or PAWS, here.  This period of experiencing these healing symptoms usually lasts anywhere from 3 – 6 months, but could last a little longer. 

You have 2 choices.  The 1st choice is to keep drinking.  With this choice there will be a painful progression and whatever emotions and physical repercussions you’re experiencing now will only be enhanced in time. 

The 2nd choice is to quit drinking and embark on the most heroic journey.  This choice gives you options, and you don’t have to decide today. 

 

[14:50] Paul introduces Dee. 

 

Dee is 50 years old and recently moved to Albuquerque, NM.  She works as a purchaser for the Federal Government.  For fun Dee enjoys walking, hiking, biking, and meeting up with her fellow sober peeps. 

 

[17:20] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Dee was first introduced to alcohol by her parents as a child during the holidays.  With high school came beer.  Between high school and the age of 21 Dee really didn’t do much drinking.  21 years old rolls around and Dee got really good at drinking and socializing.  Alcohol seemed to fix her feelings of not being enough.  Always a tomboy Dee felt the guys didn’t really take an interest in her so the alcohol helped her become more flirtatious.   

At the age of 25 Dee became, what she called, a pro at drinking.  Dee’s dad got sick and passed, this prompted her to switch from drinking beer to hard liquor, thinking this would stop her from becoming an alcoholic.  A month later Dee’s husband died.  Dee says she dove into the booze at this time and continued to drink heavily for years. 

 

[23:15] Do you feel that you properly grieved?

 

Dee says she did not, that she didn’t know how to properly grieve.  Alcohol helped her get through this time in her life, when she was in so much pain she didn’t want to live.  It allowed her to sleep and it allowed her to manage getting up every day. 

 

[25:25] What role did alcohol play in your 30s and 40s? 

 

Dee was living in Florida and back to drinking “normal”.  At 33 Dee moved to Atlanta and decided she needed to quit drinking, so she did.  She quit for 7 months.  She started going to AA, and although she didn’t feel it was for her she continued to go because that is what she knew to do at the time. 

 

After an offer of some free Dom Pérignon, Dee began drinking again.  Fast forward to when Dee first joined Café RE.  This was when her drinking really started to escalate, in 2018.  Dee was in an unhappy marriage and although she didn’t want to drink, she couldn’t stop.  Dee first joined Café RE in June 2018 and then thought she had her drinking under control and could moderate.  She quit RE and drank for another 4 months before rejoining in January 2019. 

 

[31:50] Was there an emotional rock bottom?

 

Dee says she fought with God, her higher power, over this for 25+ years.  She says it was exhausting having one foot in church and one foot doing the drinking thing.  So, Dee made the decision to face life without the alcohol.       

 

[38:15] You’re entering the scary and uncomfortable area in life, called the unknown, how is this going?

 

Dee says it is going well and she is not afraid.    

 

[39:40] Has there been cravings?

 

Having the mindset that drinking is not an option has helped Dee.  Dee has a lot of options to reach out to people when she needs to, and she uses them.  Connection and community are key.  Dee is slowly building connections locally, in a healthy way.    

 

[41:50] What is something that you learned at the RE Bozeman Retreat that you can implement in your journey?

 

Dee says the meditation and the breathwork were the two big things for her, they have helped her slow down and stay in the present.    

 

[45:00] What are your thoughts on relapse? 

 

Dee says she hates that word.  That is breaks her heart when she sees people posting that they have relapsed, and not because she thinks less of them, but because she knows how hard it is to pick yourself back up and stack days. 

 

[47:15] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

You can do it. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Nashville and Bozeman. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Waterloo Sparkling Water, Mango flavored. 

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Well, the number one is Café RE.     

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

Writing a book. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Believe in yourself. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You are in Ireland, flying solo, and you walk into a bar in Dublin, and there’s all guys.  One of the guys proposes to you, puts his ring on your finger, you go to the restroom and the ring falls off in the toilet, you have to fish it out, and you have to break up with him. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

RE LIVE in Colorado – June 11-14th, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Honey

This episode is brought to you by the smart shopping assistant Honey. Get Honey for free at www.joinhoney.com/elevator . Honey, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when you're shopping online

 

Hello Fresh

Get 9 free meals at www.hellofresh.com/recoveryfresh9 and use the promocode recoveryfresh9

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

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“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Nov 25, 2019

Lauren took her last drink on November 17, 2018.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about the ‘how’, and says not to worry about the how you are going to quit drinking.  Once you know the ‘why’ you want to quit drinking the how always solves itself. 

If you need help coming up with the why, most likely you have an encyclopedia of evidence behind you.  It could be the intense emotional dips, depression, anxiety, letting yourself or those you love down.  Put that why to work in your favor. 

 

[13:30] Paul introduces Lauren. 

 

Lauren is 38 years old.  She lives in Sharon, Mass, and is adjunct faculty at a university in Boston in their School of Social Work.  Lauren is married and has 3 children.  For fun Lauren enjoys spending time outside, listening to LIVE music and hanging out with friends. 

 

[15:47] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Lauren says alcohol set up shop in her life while she was attending the University of Mass.  In 2007 while she was finishing up her Masters in Social Work, she came across a binge drinking scale and realized that she had surpassed all female scales and was binge drinking like a man.  This was the first time the Lauren felt, in her gut, that something might be wrong. 

 

Instead of listening to this bodily cue Lauren pushed it away and ignored it. 

 

In 2009 Lauren met her wife and saw a life she wanted and made some changes in terms of her drinking. 

 

[19:00] Talk to me about those changes that you made?

 

Lauren says she just naturally toned it down a little bit.  Her partner had children so they started doing more family things.  In 2011 they were married.  Lauren says that, at this time, her drinking was progressing and taking up more and more space in her life. 

 

In 2013 there was a hard stoop in Lauren’s drinking, during her pregnancy, and she gave birth to their daughter.  Even though there was this break in her drinking things picked up right where she left off. 

 

[20:25] What happens next? 

 

Lauren is a stay at home mom and her drinking escalates.  She wasn’t isolating, she joined a mom’s group, and really didn’t think she had a drinking problem because she wasn’t drinking during the day.  Lauren says that she started using drinking as a reward.  She was blacking out more frequently, her relationships started suffering and Lauren says that, clearly, her addiction had the upper hand. 

 

[21:40] When did you start to realize there was a problem?

 

November 20, 2018, they got a phone call, one that you never hope to receive.  Lauren’s stepson exited his car on a busy roadway and was struck by an oncoming vehicle.  They soon learned that his injuries were far too significant for treatment and had to prepare to say goodbye.  All the emotions and feelings she had been dousing in alcohol over the years came to the surface.       

 

[23:40] What happened on November 20th?

 

Lauren says she somehow allowed all those emotions in fully and was unexplainably present in that hospital room.  As the hours passed, she began to notice that along with all the pain and sadness in that hospital room there was something beautiful happening.  Lauren says she felt gratitude, and felt it in every fiber of her body. 

 

[30:50] What happened after that first AA meeting?

 

Lauren say she stuck it out with AA and is still working the steps and feels that there is great value to the steps. 

 

[31:30] What was life like after that?

 

Lauren says the first weeks were really hard, but that all her relationships improved. 

 

[37:38] Talk to us about your experience with the breathwork session we had at the RE Bozeman Retreat.

 

Lauren says she is glad she didn’t know anything about breathwork prior to the session so she just followed directions and was breathing like they said to.  Lauren experienced her stepson, Michael, visiting and talking to her during the session. 

 

[48:00] What’s on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life? 

 

Travel and showing our daughter the world.

 

[49:00] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That it’s not about alcohol anymore. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

The fact that I have memories.  Everyday with my family is memorable. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Pamplemousse LaCroix

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Podcasts…Recovery Elevator, Recovery Happy Hour, and I do a lot of reading on The Temper.   

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

You’re worth it.  You can do it. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You add Tito’s to your spiked seltzer. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Nov 18, 2019

Patrick took his last drink on January 1, 2019.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

A new Café RE group will be launching January 1, 2020!  Also, Recovery Elevator Meet-ups in Australia have been scheduled for December!  Be sure to check the events calendar or the weekly email. 

Paul is currently working on a meditation course, that he hopes to have out by early next year…warning, you may just might fall in love with yourself. 

On today’s episode Paul talks about sharing and owning our story.   This can be therapeutic, but also, if done too many times, dangerous.  Why?  Your story becomes your future.  How do we stop this?  We learn to protect us from our thoughts.  When you take your energies and thoughts off your past addictions and traumas they can disappear.  One way to do this is through meditation.

 

[11:15] Paul introduces Patrick. 

 

Patrick was born and raised in Boston.  He is a high school teacher and teaches religion and history.  He is married and has a 6-year-old daughter.  For fun Patrick likes long distance hiking, car camping and road trips.  

 

[14:20] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Patrick says he accepted that he was an alcoholic at the age of 18 when he entered the seminary.  He got a fake ID at the age of 16 and was going into liquor stores at 16 and buying his own liquor.  At the age of 18 Patrick started going to AA meetings.  Patrick started drinking again, about the age of 29, and only beer. 

 

The next couple of years the beer became scotch, then vodka.  After about 2 weeks of consuming vodka for 2 weeks Patrick contemplated suicide.  When his baby was only 2 weeks old Patrick went to the hospital.  He is 45 years old.  He is checked into the hospital for 9 days to detox.  A year later…picking up his 1-year chip at an AA meeting, he had already had a couple drinks before the meeting. 

 

 

[19:35] What happened next?

 

Patrick and his wife decided they were going to have a baby.  Wasn’t what he planned…but he started hitting the bottle hard.  He started hiding bottles all over.  Patrick wrapped bottles in his hospital bag to get through the birth of his child. 

 

[33:50] What was different this time? 

 

Patrick says he reached a turning point, he could stay on the couch drinking scotch and vodka and have his wife leave him, or live the life he knew he wanted.      

 

[39:45] How’d you do it??

 

Like a bird…worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.  Be fully present in every moment.     

 

[43:50] What are some of the lessons you have learned about yourself along the way?

 

Patrick says he is discovering who he’s always been.   

 

[45:30] Were there cravings?

 

Patrick says he has had cravings in the past but not the past 9 months.    

 

[47:05] How has your life changed without alcohol?

 

Patrick says he is fully present with his wife and with his daughter…and fully present with himself.     

 

[47:50] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Honesty.  I lied mostly to myself, and then when I stopped it got better. 

 

  1. What is a gift that sobriety has given you?

 

Camping on the river with my daughter. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Polar Mango Cherry Bliss.  

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Podcasts…Recovery Elevator, This Naked Mind, Recovery Revolution, I go to AA and volunteer at a detox center. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

A cross country trip with my 6-year-old.    

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Brutal honesty with self. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

You shoot vodka nips on your way to your 1-year AA anniversary. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Nov 11, 2019

Jody took her last drink on October 20, 2015.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul shares with the listeners the many (12) steps, and team members, it takes to put a podcast episode together.  And listeners…you are part of the team! 

Paul also covers an article he came across that talks about the relationship between alcohol and antisocial behavior is well documented.  You can find a link to the article here.

 

The question is, can we blame our bad behavior on the alcohol?  The study in this article says no.  Alcohol, according to the study, does not change your personality.  Drunken you has the same moral compass as sober you. 

 

[10:20] Paul introduces Jody. 

 

Jody is 30 years old and lives in Orlando, Florida.  She is a flight attendant and a mindset and transformation coach.  Jody is not married and does not have any kids, yet.  She loves to travel, read, cook, and do yoga. 

 

[13:25] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Jody was introduced to alcohol her freshman year of college.  She found that alcohol helped her social anxiety.  After graduating from college, she thought she would leave the binge drinking behind.  That didn’t happen.  She continued to drink and smoke and have blackouts, and this frustrated Jody. 

 

[17:15] Can you dive deeper into your frustration?

 

She moved back home and that addiction followed her.  It helped her find people that made her feel normal.   Once she decided she wanted to become a flight attendant she knew she would have to stop smoking because they drug test you.  So, she did, and she got the job.  During this time Jody started drinking more and drinking alone. 

 

[22:40] Get us up to speed, did you try to moderate, was there a rock bottom moment? 

 

When she started drinking alone, she tried to make rules and moderate, always breaking the rules.  The voice inside got really loud and she started to believe that the world would be a better place without her.  She felt her problem was too big.  This is when she started to listen to the Recovery Elevator podcast.  She got a new therapist and at the age of 27 she identified herself as an alcoholic, a word she does not use anymore. 

 

[24:30] Tell me your thinking on not using the word alcoholic anymore?

 

Jody feels very passionate about this…this feels it’s a very dangerous and harmful term to use.  

 

[27:40] Bring us up to October 20, 2015.

 

Jody says she was just sick and tired or being sick and tired.    

 

[28:20] What happened after that?

 

Jody says she’s pretty much did it on her own.   She took it one day at a time.  Jody structured her days and it helped her stay sober and grounded.   

 

[29:15] In the first couple months did you experience cravings, and how’d you get past them?

 

Jody says she made a really firm decision that she didn’t want to drink and she didn’t experience cravings. 

 

[30:20] Share with us your biggest life lessons during the last 4 years. 

 

Jody’s first year was dedicated to loving herself.  Year 2, 3, & 4 was all about mindset.  She changed the way she viewed what had happened and how alcohol was viewed in out society.  This ultimately made her leave AA. 

 

[33:40] Tell us about being a Mindset and Transformation Coach.

 

About a year ago Jody decided she wanted to do something to help others that want to be alcohol free.  There is nothing to be ashamed of. 

 

[38:25] You are loud and proud on social media, what has been the response?

 

Jody says her posts are never about her, they are about the people that need to hear it.  About sharing her story for those that need to hear that message. 

 

[43:30] Where can people get in contact with you? 

 

You can find Jody on Instagram here

 

[44:00] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Realizing I am not my addiction, I am not what I have experienced. 

 

  1. What is a gift that sobriety has given you?

 

Being fully present at all times.    

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Recently I had a spicy AF jalapeno margherita.  

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Annie Grace’s This Naked Mind, Alan Carr’s The Easy Way to Quit Drinking for Women, this podcast, and anyone that is loud and proud on Instagram. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I want to help as many people as I can through coaching. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Be open, and committed.  Stay curious. 

 

You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

If you use the layering technique in your recycling bin.    

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Jody via Instagram @jodyventura

 

You Can’t Blame Alcohol for Acting Like an A-hole Anymore, Say Scientists

https://www.inverse.com/article/58809-alcohol-study-does-it-change-your-personality

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Nov 4, 2019

Wendall took his last drink on June 13, 2019.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about the 5 responses you get when you tell people you don’t drink.  He also discusses what you do when you accidently post on social media that you no longer drink. 

The 5 responses: 

70% of the time you hear total support, “Wow that’s so cool, because I want you to be the best version of you.”

 

20% of the time the response will be that the person you told has a family member or close friend that has also quit drinking alcohol. 

 

5% of the time you will get bombarded with questions as to why you don’t drink. 

 

4% of the time they will be supportive but will no longer be a part of your life, drinking was the reason they were. 

 

1% of the time they will not be supportive of your decision to ditch the booze. 

 

[22:30] Paul introduces Wendall. 

 

Wendall lives in Toronto Ontario, Canada.  He is 42 years old and is a director, producer, and cinematographer of documentaries.  Wendall is married and has a 6-year-old son.  For fun Wendall enjoys getting out in nature. 

 

[23:35] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Wendall says he didn’t really start drinking until he was in university, about 1996.   Up until his late 30’s he was mostly a social drinker.  Things shifted then.  He was working a lot, traveling a lot, was stressed.  Drinking became habitual at this time; it was both a reward and a stress reliever.  With added responsibilities, came anxiety.  Drinking then became a coping mechanism.  In 2018 Wendall realized that all the rules of moderation he had tried to put in place weren’t working. 

 

About 6 months ago binge drinking really started to rear its ugly head.  He finally decided he couldn’t drink anymore. 

 

[34:00] How did it feel after you set the bottle down?

 

It felt like every new beginning comes from some others beginnings end.

 

[35:25] What was it like living life without alcohol the first few days and weeks? 

 

Because his drinking was habitual Wendall realized he would have to create new habits.  He started listening to recovery podcasts.  His first 30 days was done pretty much in solitude.  Instead of having his normal evening drinks he would listen to a podcast and read a few chapters. 

 

[39:20] How long did it take for the new habits to take hold?

 

Wendall says it only took about 14 days because he wanted it so badly. 

 

[43:00] Have you told your film crew or others in your industry?

 

Wendall has told his film crew as the situation came up, he simply tells them he just doesn’t drink. 

 

[48:24] This project, Sober House, showed up on your plate when you were also exploring a life without alcohol?

 

Wendall says it showed up in and around the time he was having some internal conflict with his drinking.  Listening to the kids in this film talk about how much alcohol has impacted their lives was like the hammer hitting the nail square on the head. 

 

[51:52] How can the listeners find out more information about this project? 

 

They can go to www.soberhouse.ca , they can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at soberhousefilm.

 

 

[53:27] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Moments with my son are way better without a hangover. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

While filming in the Yukon and coming out of the tent in the morning, mist rising off the lake, the sun streaming down and the mountain revealing itself. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

Does ice cream count?  

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

I really dialed back into my love of reading.  The Recovery Elevator podcast, I binged that pretty hard the first 30 days, same with Recovery Happy Hour. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

To really have great experiences with my family.   

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

I have 2, the first one is to listen to your body.  The second one is listen to your body. 

 

  1. You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

If you know where every liquor store is in every major airport in your country. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Sober House film

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oERDuy1WxgU&t=72s

 

Honey
This episode is brought to you by the smart shopping assistant Honey. Get Honey for free at  www.joinhoney.com/elevator. Honey, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when you're shopping online. 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Oct 28, 2019

Jay took his last drink on Decemeber 26, 2018.  This is his story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about a response to a post on Reddit.  Not knowing exactly what the initial post said, Paul guesses it was something about the poster wanting to ditch the booze, but not being able to. 

The response…” You know what, you‘re heading in the right direction to win.  You want to stop.  You literally cannot win without that.  I’ve lost friends to booze and none of them wanted to stop.  Wanting to stop provides friction.  It adds resistance to drinking, which has the effect of reducing your intake.  Maybe you start an hour later in the day.  Maybe you drink one glass less.  That helps.  It makes it easier to apply more friction in the future.” 

The intention to stop is the most important thing. 

 

[9:44] Paul introduces Jay. 

 

Jay is 37 years old and grew up in upstate New York.  He has lived in North Carolina for the last 9 years.  He has a full-time sales job and a full time real-estate side hustle.  He enjoys mountain biking and golf.  He is married. 

 

[11:05] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

In high school Jay had fun after the Friday night football games.  In college Jay partied on Friday and Saturday nights.  He was a weekend warrior during his twenties.  He relocated in 2010 and started experiencing problems that he couldn’t solve.  This is when alcohol really made it’s appearance. 

 

 [14:40] Do you feel your sports background backfired when it came to quitting drinking?

 

Yes.  Jay says he ran into a set of problems that he could not out hustle, could not out grind. 

[15:30] Early thirties and anxiety is creeping up, take it from there. 

 

Rather than talking about it with the people he loved he internalized it.  2016-2018 Jay says he was a pressure cooker.  He was never saying no, never setting boundaries.

 

[17:50] Did you ever try to moderate? 

 

Around 2016 Jay recognized that alcohol was getting out of control. He would go 30-40 days AF a few times a year.  After trying to fight a stranger at a party Jay knew the gig was up.  He later had a conversation with his best friend and told him that he thought he had a drinking problem.  Jay says that in that moment he felt a weight off his shoulders. 

 

[27:24] What did you find when you went internal?

 

Jay learned that he’s a people pleaser, that he didn’t know what boundaries were, and having his emotional bids minimized really hurt. 

 

[32:20] How’d you do it?

 

Jay says ever since the moment he told his friend that he has a drinking problem he has not experienced cravings.  He has not attended AA, and does not like the term ‘alcoholic’. 

 

[33:35] What’s been the hardest thing you’ve gone through in sobriety? 

 

Jay says he’s gone through some events where there has been a lot of drinking and when people asked him why he wasn’t drinking his reply was, “I have goals so big that I and to give up some things.” 

 

[37:15] What advice can you give to guys out there about emotions?

 

There is no courage without vulnerability. 

 

[41:05] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

Finally digging down to what was causing the sadness and now having an awareness of that. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has given you?

 

Those moments where this incredible peace overcomes you. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I drink coffee and water.  

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources on this journey?

 

Writing in my journal every morning has been a tremendous help. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Fly to California and drive the Pacific Coast Highway from end to end. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Have the courage to be honest with yourself and with the people closest to you. 

 

  1. You might need to ditch the booze if...

 

If you self-impose a rule of only two 24 oz. Twisted Teas and then switch to Miller Lights because you’re worried about cavities.   

 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – It All Starts From the Inside Out.  We can do this.”

Oct 21, 2019

Gracie took her last drink on September 29, 2018.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about connection.  Human connection is an innate need to create a social bond with others. 

For those that found a temporary connection with alcohol and are now trying to ditch the booze now find them facing disconnection head on.  You are listening to the inner voice that isn’t craving alcohol, but is craving connection. 

How to connect…ask for connection every single morning.  Aim for 50% to be external connections, and the other 50% internal.  If a connection is built within, we can go through difficult times in life and still feel that warmth.  If you address the internal connection the external connection solves itself.

SHOW NOTES

 

[14:25] Paul introduces Gracie. 

 

Gracie grew up in the Midwest and is currently living in Chicago.  She is 32 years old and is a nurse.  Gracie loves camping, backpacking, traveling abroad doing medical trips, and has recently gotten into rock and minerals.  She lives with her boyfriend, who is 4 years sober. 

 

[22:55] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Gracie didn’t start drinking until she was 19 years old and off at college.  Her drinking didn’t get bad until age 21/22 when she was in the Peace Corp and was partying hard with the other volunteers.  In her mid-twenties she was binge drinking on the weekends and coming home and drinking by herself.  She was experiencing a lot of loneliness and anxiety at the time, so would drink.  By Gracie’s late 20s she was drinking most nights and having blackouts. 

 

Gracie says she had a lot of ‘soft bottoms’ and it wasn’t until she was about 28 years old that it occurred to her that she needed to stop drinking.  It was at this time that Gracie was starting to read self-help books and was interested in spiritual growth.  As she started getting into medication retreats and plant medicine, she says she kept getting the message, from her heart, that her drinking was holding her back. 

 

[37:45] How did it feel when you started to feel your feelings?

 

Gracie says she was afraid in the beginning, that she was even afraid to feel a feeling coming on.  She says meditation helped her let the feelings come and pass.  Gracie says it took months for her to learn to trust that a feeling wouldn’t swallow her whole. 

 

[41:45] Was there a rock bottom before you quit drinking?

 

Gracie says there was a lot of heartbreaking moments.  She was functioning but her relationships were suffering.  She says there was this constant low-grade feeling of disfunction. 

 

[44:50] Share with us how you did it. 

 

Podcasts and books were a big part of her getting sober.  For maintenance she uses her sobriety tracker on her phone.  She is running a lot and taking her health more seriously. 

 

[46:55] Do you have an in-person community that you meet up with?

 

Gracie says she does not, but that she thinks that may be what is next.  Meetings have never been part of her journey but she says that may be her next step.    

 

[48:12] What was the response when you posted on social media?

 

Gracie says the response was so supportive and it proved to be a very good thing for her.    

 

[50:25] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

I guess when I first heard, “stop obsessing about the word alcoholic and just look at what drinking is doing in your life.”. 

 

  1. What is a gift sobriety has given you?

 

So much energy.

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I love gingerale and I love this Jamaican drink called Ting.

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I’m starting some trainings and certifications to become a flight nurse.

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Feel your feelings and love yourself.  Make sobriety the most important thing in your life. 

 

  1. You might have a drinking problem if...

 

You are an avid camper and want to achieve the perfect amount of hydration with drunkenness so you mix vodka with flavored Smart Water and just end up making a total ass of yourself. 

 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – We took the elevator down; we have to take the stairs back up. 

We can do this.”

Oct 14, 2019

Patty took her last drink on July 19, 2017.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about the two main sources of unhappiness and how hope is sending us barreling off a cliff.  On the surface hope is great.  But where is it located on a timeline?  In the future, not in the now. 

If hope isn’t serving us, then what?  Throttle back on the hope and lean into ‘this moment’. 

SHOW NOTES

 

[12:00] Paul introduces Patty. 

 

Patty is 665 years old and is originally from Fairbanks, AK.  She currently lives in Corvallis, OR.  Patty has 3 children in their forties and 7 grandkids.  She worked at a university for 30 years and is now retired.  For fun Patty likes to hike, kayak, and sailing. 

 

[13:55] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Patty says she was 14 years od the first time she got drunk, and that she was a black-out drinker her very first time.  It wasn’t until she was in her 30’s that she felt she may have a problem; it was then she started to drink at home alone. 

 

When Patty was in her forties, she started to attempt to give up alcohol.  She would go a couple days up to 11 months, and that went on for about 15 years. 

 

[18:15] Was there a moment that it got scary for you?

 

In early 2017 she drove home drunk from the airport and realized the next morning how dangerous that was.  She says it scared her, that she could have killed someone, or herself. 

 

[20:50] How did you do it those first couple weeks?

 

Patty said she had a different mindset this time.  This time her mindset was one of, ‘I don’t have to do this (drink) anymore’, rather than, ‘I can’t do this anymore.’

 

[26:00] What are some improvements in life that you have experienced in a life without alcohol? 

 

Patty says she used to make a lot of plans and then not follow through with them, she doesn’t do that anymore.  She has signed up to get her pilot’s license, something that she has always wanted to do.  Going to the RE Bozeman retreat.  She has been a lot more physically active, instead of talking about walking the dog, she just gets up and goes. 

 

[30:25] What is something that you’ve had to go through in the last 2 years that you didn’t expect?

 

Patty’s mom died 3 months ago and drinking didn’t even seem like an option.  It was a real tough time, losing her mom and with family drama, but she was able to be present and she didn’t have conversations that she regretted later. 

 

[37:20] What’s the biggest thing you’ve learned about yourself in these last 2 years?

 

Patty says it’s that she in genuinely a happy person. 

 

[38:00] Was there a rock-bottom moment?

 

The drive home from the Eugene airport.  Also, on July 19 drinking with her daughter, who herself was struggling with alcohol, and her 16-year-old granddaughter. 

 

[43:00] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That I don’t have to drink. 

 

  1. What is a memorable moment that a life without alcohol has provided you?

 

Waking up early, I have just started taking a morning Pilates class. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

LaCroix, hands down.     

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

I hope to live in Panama half of the year, and I’m working on that.    

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources in recovery?

 

Definitely Café RE, and I’m a reader so I have every self-help book probably written since 1972. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Think it all the way through, and remember you just don’t have to drink. 

 

  1. You might have a drinking problem if...

 

You consider dropping $100 at every airport bar as just part of your traveling expense. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

ZipRecruiter

This episode is brought to you in support by ZipRecruiter. Right now, my listeners can try ZipRecruiter for free. Visit Ziprecruiter.com/elevator

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – We can do this.”

Oct 7, 2019

Kelly took her last drink on October 27, 2017.  This is her story.

Update on the Alcohol is Sh!t book!  The book is out!  Pick up your paperback copy on Amazon here!  You can get the Audible version here!

On today’s episode Paul talks about his idea of opening an in person, wellness retreat center in Costa Rica.  And while he has been working to create space for this idea and concept, and believes that the body is on board, there is still some discomfort getting out of his comfort zone. 

The fact is, we all have rough days, including Paul.  He says it’s important to give the body permission to feel the feelings, and also to give the body permission to allow them to go. 

If this retreat center is something you’d be interested in attending email Paul at info@recoveryelevator.com

Paul also addresses the question of, when do you know it’s a good time, after quitting alcohol, to start tackling other substances, behaviors, thought patterns, etc.?  Paul’s advice is to go slow and to be patient, your body will know when it is time.  

SHOW NOTES

 

[15:15] Paul introduces Kelly. 

 

Kelly is 54 years old.  She is married and has 2 adult children.  Kelly is a full-time social worker at a hospital, and she speaks Spanish.  For fun Kelly would like to get back into collecting vintage clothing.  She likes to read and is looking forward to getting into outdoor activities. 

 

 

[19:30] Give us a background on your drinking.

 

Kelly started drinking in 9th grade, just your average high school drinker.  By her 2nd year of high school she feels she was drinking more regularly.  She didn’t think she has a problem with alcohol because she wasn’t like her father.  In 1987 she moved, thinking that that would fix any drinking issues she had. 

 

[31:05] What happened right before you quit drinking? 

 

There were a lot of stresses going on.  She was constantly afraid of being pulled over to started to us LYFT.  There was a lot of risk taking.  She started buying bigger bottles. 

 

Her son started to go to meetings for his own addictions.  One nigh he told Kelly he didn’t feel it was safe for him to live at home, because of her drinking.  That was the last night she drank. 

 

[39:15] Talk to us about how you are embracing AA and the other side?

 

For the first 18 months Kelly was only doing AA.  But she was also reading a ton of books by/or about women alcoholics.  She says the AA meeting have been helpful but that she is bothered by some of the steps. 

 

[53:00] Rapid Fire Round

 

  1. What’s a lightbulb moment you’ve had on this journey?

 

That I am as strong as I am. 

 

  1. What is your favorite alcohol-free drink?

 

I like kombucha, and I like coffee.   

 

  1. What are some of your favorite resources in recovery?  

 

I like Russel Brands’ Recovery on CD.  I listen to him in the car.  AA meetings, I do like 3-4 a week, and the Big Book. 

 

  1. What is on your bucket list in an alcohol-free life?

 

Eventually liking the outdoors.  Getting outside more. 

 

  1. And what parting piece of guidance can you give to listeners?

 

Listen to any voice inside that is telling you that something is wrong. 

 

  1. You might have a drinking problem if...

 

You are 23-year-old woman that has gout. 

 

Upcoming retreats:

Asia Adventure – January 20-31, 2020

You can find more information about this event here

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Honey

This episode is brought to you by the smart shopping assistant Honey. Get Honey for free at www.joinhoney.com/elevator . Honey, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when you're shopping online

 

 

Connect with Cafe RE- Use the promo code OPPORTUNITY for your first month free

Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Sobriety Tracker Android

Sober Selfies! - Send your Sober Selfie and your Success Story to info@recoveryelevator.com

 

“Recovery Elevator – We took the elevator down, we have to take the stairs back up.”

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